headline: "Mass outage in Bay Area rapid transit system, all trains grounded! Reporter quoted, 'what can I say, total eclipse of the BART'"
headline: "Local bakery has disasterous accident, day's pastries burnt to black! Reporter quoted, 'what can I say, total eclipse of the tarts'"
headline: "Disaster at the art gallery! Vandal reportedly splashed black paint over paintings! Reporter quoted, 'what can I say, total eclipse of the art'"
headline: "last bastion of a failed retailer finally closes after second bankruptcy! Reporter quoted, 'what can I say, total eclipse of K-mart"
