I am very attenuated to 3D space. I like biking and horseback riding because those subtle shifts in your weight change what you're doing to such a large degree. The board game I'm probably the best at is Jenga, since I can feel and understand the shifts in weight of all the blocks so easily.
So my sense of "being" and "being here" is connected to that. I (bird) am aware of when I'm not at the front, where I'm in the middle back or back-back or back and up and to the right, it's those sensations of "being" somewhere "inside" that isn't where I'm "supposed" to be. Sometimes, when Aether comes to the front, it feels like I've been tackled, there's the being knocked aside and flipped around and, ugh, it's hard to describe without hand motions.
The thing about covid that is messing with me the most is all of those inner ear/nose/throat tubes are clogged up, so my sense of balance is really off. It was really bad yesterday, I couldn't tell who was fronting or what was going on. Today it is a LITTLE better, so I know it is me, bird, who is fronting.
But my dreams were so chaotic. It was like everyone was dreaming at once. There was only one long enough chunk of sleeping last night where I had a chance to dream, and I felt like I had 5-10 different dreams at once. And I knew this was happening, which means it was everyone else having dreams. I am not able to lucid dream my own dreams, but the others's, but all that does is make me aware that I am watching someone else's dream lol
Also I'm finally watching Stone Ocean and, man, there are a lot of DID-y stuff here. Foo fighters and dealing with the body, Jolyne having no memory of anything. Hrm