Given hypothetical godlike powers over reality, would you decree that toast always lands butter-side up, or take the path of darkness and insist on butter-side down? What about the choice of chaos, unmooring buttered toast from fate so humanity may have more control over their destinies?
All buttered toast now falls through time and space to land butter side down in one specific spot, namely directly above the head of one Gary Zdarsky of Sandusky, OH, at 9:37 AM on September 23rd, 1987.