Parker Posey's Mouth

Someone catch me up on the past 24 hours, I feel like I'm missing something. Something dire...

Most of it isn't mine. But I at least want to get rid of what is. I'm tired of living around other people's clutter, and think it would be phenomenal for my mental health if I could ever get out in front of all this stuff I don't need or want, that takes up space and restricts my lifestyle, simply because stuff has to be somewhere.

A problem I always face when inspired to make another stab at cleaning and organizing is that I simply don't know what to do with some of these things. Old electronic parts (doubtful anything of interest) and weird little knick-knacks that I've acquired somehow, but never had a use or place for. 'Antique' or just old worn down rubbish furniture my Mother hoarded that I can't get rid of, but that doesn't serve MY needs. You ever try to use a 1930's writing desk as a makeup station? Not efficient!

And then there's the issue of what to do with the things I keep. My comic collection, not of any value to anyone but me, but it's also not something I can organize in the space I've got, so as to actually be able to access it. I can't catalogue or curate it, there's simply no room to unpack it! And don't even get me started on toys. I used to play heroclix, and when all of my friends dropped out of it, I inherited several collections of junk. I dropped out of it too, but have nobody to dump it on. And no real way to sell the handful that might be worth something on ebay. The lego sets... oof. I'd rather start a smaller more focused collection than try to salvage what I already have. Not that I have space to collect and display lego anymore. My hope is that when my Sister's kid(s) are old enough, I can shuffle my depression collection off to them to have fun with. But I mean, I have sets I really never wanted because people would buy them for me as a gift. Or I'd buy them for me because I needed the tiny dopamine hit of having a new thing when I was in a much worse chapter of my life.

And there's things I don't know about. My semi-embarassing DVD collection, my incredibly embarassing books, my clothing which I have both too much and not enough of. What do I do with it, even if I can overcome the fear of losing physical media forever? We all know Salvation Army is a scam, and I happen to know Goodwill is too. And again, I cannot stress how marginal the value of anything here is, so finding someone to buy or simply inherit a lot of it seems iffy. And did you know Best Buy doesn't bother recycling anymore? Not that everything they took in actually got recycled, but I could at least leave tech trash for them to figure out. Is there even a responsible way to rid myself of this stuff?

Someday, I had hoped I'd be able to simply hire a cleaning/organization expert to guide me through this. It's overwhelming, and requires skills I never developed (what with the hoarder Mother and all.) But like... I shouldn't have to wait for a fantasy scenario to deliver me from the hollow 'comforts' of modern living in a consumer society. I want a space that's mine, organized for me, where I'm the priority, and I don't drown in junk that fills up every corner of my zone. Is that too much to ask?

and I don't think I'm getting any closer to finding fulfillment in my life.