a friend was promoted to a moderator in that first server I was in and was doing a lot of good, which makes me tempted, but I remember just being at my dearth as a human being when I was there. I remember being so stressed out I was going to bed at four at the earliest and not eating properly. That was a dark time and I was lucky it was during a bird course. I did want to do more research during that bird course, though. All these hangups tell me I'm not in the right headspace to take that kind of gamble.

I've done something very very good these past couple weeks, and that's been having a lot of enriching things to keep myself occupied