So, first a little backstory because it's needed here.
SO was reading the "Tobira: Gateway to advance Japanese" book a bit casually just before X-mas/Christmas/Yule. On page 97 there was a nice part about about units of measure in the language, which is rather different than ours but not the point.
The word "一兆" was there but without any furigana (hiragana so I can look up how it's read/pronounced) so I whipped out my mobile and looked it up in google translate within the browser. It means "one trillion" BTW.
Anyway, so I then turned off the screen on the phone and put it by my side and put on the headset that was attached to my laptop to listen to some sound files from the book as I read the text with it. Remember my phone was in standby mode, or whatever it's called, so I could not write anything at all. Nor did I have any physical contact with it anyway.
I, several minutes later, got the phone back, entered the passcode and activated the screen again but something was off. Very so.
Now there was not one word there, but many. Some kanji, others in hiragana, katakana and even romaji, or Western alphabet and on top of that even numbers.
Now if I would have written this I would have had to change between the normal and Japanese keyboard on the phone which is a bit of a hassle in itself, but the screen wasn't even on so no way I wrote this myself, even by mistake.
So here's the message in it's full, odd glory:

一兆pppしてがオオから。がお葬式してpooして!オプション価格からのオッパイから揚げ多９おぇくださいょｌｏｌｏｏしてょから!っプロ尾からの０ＰＬして!くださいＬ９してからオポチュニティこくさいからの!くださいが?ください、!ください尾おくださいからＰＬＯおから?尾おがからお０お?ください、!お気?くださいから俺〇から揚げから?おりラジ

Of course google translate had, well, translated this which was one of of the oddities that caught my attention to begin with, and here it is:

"One trillion ppp is from oh. Please give me a funeral and poo! From the option price, please give me 9 fried breasts. Give me a lolooo! Please give me 0PL from the pro tail! Please give me L9 and then give me the opportunity! ?Please, !Please give me the tail, PLO Okara?Tail Ogakara0?Please, !Please?Please give me 〇Fried Kara?Ori Raji"

So I was rather confused as to what the flying fuck this was all about.

A friend, who lives in Japan and speaks the language, also got a good lulz but he also can't get how this happened to begin with.
Hypothesis is that it was on recording by accident, but I can't even turn that on even when I try.

It must be a message from an entity from another planet, or dimension even, sending me this. I am the receiver, ultimate achiever! And this might just be the first step to save our world!
So get ready for some funeral, poo and 9 fried breasts for sacrifice purposes!

P.S: I gave it a go inDuckDuckGo and DeepL to see if it could decipher this a bit more. You can look them up yourselves! Seems like someone or something might want to fry me....or all of us!