Staying sober is hard and painful constantly but I got a few indriect reminders recently that no, in fact, chemicals are not good for me and no matter how much it hurts at least the mental or physical pain keeps me on this side of reality most of the time.
I know part of this right now is a lack of sleep too but god that deep physical lquid feeling of anxiety attack is around the edges of my chest and I am just struggling to move my legs. Want to sleep in my bed it'll help.