~30, queer, probably other things too
Getting a Ph.D. Expect delays.
Profile pic by Nyanoraptor on twitter.
it's always been somewhere between meaningless and inane to me, like, what would it even mean to be invalid? would I pop out of existence for not being approp?riately approved by local consensus judgement?
it's wild to me because it presupposes in a sense that there is an invalid way to be, and that's a concept that is just so dreadfully online and fails to engage with the reality of the world. Nobody can look at me and arbitrate whether I'm "doing it right" or not
If someone’s eager to tell me I’m valid for something I start to get nervous I’m doing the wrong thing
I don't know, I was pretty severely neglected as a kid, so as much as I want to agree, I can't honestly say I don't both crave and require it. I'd love for it to be enough that I love me.
hey i totally get that. it takes a lot of work to generate your own validation! i was abused as a child too. i got nothing from the adults in my life but pain, so i learned very quickly that the only person who will be there for me was me. but even still, i struggle with feeling like i have no self-esteem or worth
but i believe it's worth it to try and to build myself up no matter how many times i fall. i hope this process becomes easier for us both <3
It would certainly help if my individual actions didn't consistently bring me trouble and hardship, despite my best efforts. But I'm at least getting back to a point where trying again doesn't feel like the worst possible thing I could do.
