Being a successful writer can be tricky, especially if you're new. Worse still, if you can't buy your way to the top using daddy's money, you'll have to climb over a mountain of corpses to reach your goal.
But be careful! Be aware! There are some problems that can stop you from getting very famous! Problems you can't buy or kill your way out of!
Naturally, I'm speaking about the that many newbies make. Read on for the juicy deets... 🤫
1. Failing to Establish a Robust Morphic Time Field in Act II & Ensuing Morphozonic Fusion in Act III 🚀
Novices often overlook the importance of generating a powerful Morphic Time Field during Act II's formative stage. Serving as the cornerstone for your narrative's chronological architecture, the Morphic Field ensures optimal pacing, character development, and plot progression, and without it your readers run the risk of disappearing into a timelike infinity, with your estate fully liable for the recovery of their corpses.
To be clear, I'm not suggesting that you all rush out and buy a Merriweather PZ-200; remember that the Wachowskis wrote Bound using a 50W Sheldrake coil they built from salvaged parts, or that before his first big break, Stephen King himself had to pause between each word in order to degauss his field emitter.
But a powerful Morphic Field won't mean squat if you fail to close the circuit by initiating Morphozonic Fusion in Act III. Once again, you don't need to break the bank to make it work; even a 10ç quartz crystal blessed by a part-time hag is the difference between success and failure. Without well-managed fusion, your story risks collapsing under the weight of its own disorganized energies, leaving behind nothing but a barren landscape devoid of the harmonious resonance required to captivate even the most discerning readers.
2. Neglecting the power of the Denny Effect: A Crucial Step Often Overlooked 🔥
In the pursuit of greatness, many young authors who claim to know the maxims of Archibald Denny by heart nevertheless routinely neglect the wise words of Maxim MMMCMXCIX:
"Include a Denny Moment in Act III (or, if using a Seven-Act Structure, Act VI)"
Now I know that some of you are reading this, thinking, "Who, me? Forget a Denny Moment? Not on your life, pal!" But what if I told you that one of my first sexual experiences came to a crashing halt after my paramour espied one of the many unfinished manuscripts littering my room - and, in peals of devilish laughter, pounced upon just such a failure in my plotting?
Mark my words - a Denny Moment is the key ingredient that will elevate your story above mere mortal fare and into the realm of legendary epics. When done right, it has the power to awaken the reader's deepest emotions, creating a lasting impression that leaves them begging for more. Yet despite knowing how vital these moments are, countless rookie scribes still miss this crucial step. Don't fall prey to their folly! Today's writers are tomorrow's fertiliser.
So there we have it, folks. Avoid these two deadly pitfalls, and you'll be well on your way to mastering the craft. Remember, success may not come easy, but neither does it require a sacrifice at the altar of Neptune1.
Good luck, and happy writing! 💁♀️📝✨
1 This does help, though.