Emily the Flareon

the wikipedia page for door is one of my favorite pieces of writing in the world.

the detail of the opening section, where the function of a door is described, is wonderful in itself. "A door's essential and primary purpose is to provide security by controlling access to the doorway (portal).... Doors are generally made of a material suited to the door's task." it's followed by a truly in depth history of doors. "A 5,000-year-old door has been found by archaeologists in Switzerland." "The Greek scholar Heron of Alexandria created the earliest known automatic door in the first century AD during the era of Roman Egypt." the article extols the beauty of specific doors. this is capped by a 27-photo short visual history of doors. all of the photos are beautiful.

the article continues and continues. sentences like "There are many kinds of doors, with different purposes." abound. each imaginable type of door is described in loving detail. their mechanisms, their construction. an incomprehensible detour into weatherstripping. close up photos of door hinges. "Door safety relates to prevention of door-related accidents." See also: Coal hole, Door security, Janus.

despite being a tiny catf, I hav defeafef many enemies tofay and accomplished many goals, so I deserv a treat

We are cleaning the apartment and ohhhhhh it is Nice. All the paint and bathroom stuff is white so it's very satisfying to see it turn more white as stuff is cleaned off. We are Not Very Good At Cleaning since we were not taught how or given a schedule (and the scheduled things we did felt futile because things would be just as bad, if not worse, the next time around). Yet another Adult Thing that we had to teach ourselves.

Anyway here are some Tips to make things easier:

• Put on a podcast or something you don't have to watch as background noise. Anything that can help you focus in on one task is good
• Break it up into little things (this helps with the next tip). Each thing requires different tools/chemicals and techniques so switching between things can give your body a break. Like instead of "bathroom" it's shower/tub, counters, mirrors/glass, sink etc
• Work smarter, not harder! If you spray a thing, let it it stay on for, like, 20 minutes. The chemicals need time to attack the whatever it is. So spray the shower and then go work on something else. Once that's done, you can actually scrub/wipe down the shower and there's not a lot you gotta do that's hard work.
• It's okay to cheat and buy cleaning gadgets lol. Barkeeper's Friend is so powerful, there's foaming clorox sprays. Brushes on sticks to reach things better. If anything hurts or is a pain in the ass, there's probably a better way to do it. Wander around the cleaning stuff aisle at Target and see if there's a solution to your problem lol
• Oh yeah WEAR GLOVES! The big friction point for doing dishes for us is getting our hands wet and touching wet food. But when you're wearing gloves....it's not a problem at all. A lot of cleaning chemicals are really harsh and you don't want them on your skin for very long.
• Also wear clothes you don't mind getting dirty or sweaty in. You're probably going to get wet, too, and chemicals might stain clothes. So don't wear anything nice.
• There ARE chemicals that don't smell as much, or aren't as harsh on your skin. There's also stuff that's "fragrance free" (which means no added scents) which are worth looking into if you're really sensitive to harsh smells.
• Don't be afraid to take breaks. It can be really physical which can be tiring. Sit down for a bit and check your messages or something (but don't do something that you might get distracted by for a long time, like really getting into a game).
• Have a nice cold drink! Especially at the end! And once everything is done change out of those clothes and take a nice long shower in your newly-cleaned shower lol
• If you have a lot of stuff to do, break it up over a few days. If you don't have a lot of time (especially if people are coming over) probably the thing that'll get you the most bang for your buck is cleaning your bathroom (close the shower curtain so they don't have to see how bad it is if they're not staying overnight lol). And taking out the trash/recycling. And opening up your windows to air everything out.
• If you have a specific problem (cleaning burned food out of a pot, you physically can't do x, etc), google it! There's so much information out there, everyone has had every problem before, and they've done the testing lol. Honestly Reddit is a good source for this. And things like Martha Stewart and Good Housekeeping (and other magazines your grandma had). Don't listen to Five Minute Crafts and content farms.
• Seriously get Barkeeper's Friend. But read the label on what surfaces you can/can't use it on. Plain white vinegar is really good for stuff, too, and you can get a huge gallon jug at the store for, like, a buck (it's with the oils and condiments in the grocery section). Same thing with baking soda (it's really good at absorbing bad smells, too). You can get a huge box or bag of it for super cheap (it's in the flour/sugar/baking stuff section). Most cleaning chemicals are strong acids or strong bases, which is what vinegar and baking soda are.
• You might see things that tell you to mix them together to clean things and that is bullshit. All you'll do is make the volcano stuff. They'll cancel each other out and not accomplish anything. Also there's "whacky cake" which uses vinegar + baking soda as the leavener it SUCKS don't do it. If you have no money and want to make a cake get a boxed cake mix. This isn't the great depression you don't have to suffer with whacky cake.

oops that is a lot of tips. And a bit of a baking tangent. Maybe we should do a "here are some tips for cooking/baking we had to learn on our own" thing if people want to see that lol.

If you do have the money, you can just pay someone to clean your house, too. If you have roommates, you could split the cost, and then you won't have to argue about whose turn it is to sweep anymore lol