you know what. as a special treat here's a dumb tf2 joke weapon i came up with a couple years ago
Gabe's Last Resort
Level 99 butterfly knife
Cannot get critical hits. Cannot be crit charged.
On Gabe Newell's birthday (PST), gets guaranteed critical hits.
"Good things are always worth the wait."
Appearance: the stock spy knife, but the blade is gold-plated. Changes the disguise kit to appear like a wallet, and the cigarettes for taunts into dollar bills. Animations for taunts that use them are changed appropriately.