EzioJensenTheThird

Shitposter, drinks Irn-bru

Will we have laughter and happiness in the future? Always


EmilyTheFlareon
@EmilyTheFlareon

basically, after being lovey for a while, someone suddenly said that they couldn't love me anymore unless I fixed my "problems"—which were basically core trauma—but also they wouldn't let me leave without blaming me for "ignoring my problems" and "giving up".


EzioJensenTheThird
@EzioJensenTheThird

Good for you. Don't ever feel guilty about leaving that relationship, especially when you handled it in such that it absolves of any guilt.


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in reply to @EmilyTheFlareon's post:

Learning how to accept other people as they are and not how you want them to be is, imo, the core of how to build functional relationships in one's life. Because whether one thinks they do or not, EVERYONE has needs that other people should make concessions for our of social grace, and demanding concessions from others while admitting none of your own is a defiance of the nature of relationships; they are two way streets, always.

I think your observation about how abusive relationships work is spot on, because it does boil down to the concessions and demands in the relationship being out of whack, and after a point, making the executive decision that this is unfair bullshit is completely correct.

It's very admirable that you were able to identify what was happening and get yourself out of it. That takes a lot of strength of will.

(Note to others reading this comment: I intentionally did not bring up people stuck in abusive relationships involuntarily because of reasons related to money, shelter, among other exceptional factors. it's not what the post is about, bringing it up just to cover caveats is also overall irrelevant to what I'm trying to say. I'm only including this final paragraph so nobody "well actually"s me. I know that's different.)

in reply to @EzioJensenTheThird's post: