I get a few of 'em. Mostly in regards of how capable I am as a man n' I appreciate when I get 'em. So, I try to give 'em back when appropriate which takes some people (coworkers/colleague typically) by surprise. I think part of it is how I look n' don't feel the need to talk much, so I guess that might translate as me not caring. Not that it bothers me since I go friends who understand me n' I like hangin' out with.
Anyway, I think the compliments I give towards women or someone who's feminine-presenting seems to get some kinda contention. Not with the person gettin' the compliment, but outsiders. Gettin' called a "womanizer" or "creep". For a time, I thought how I said the compliment is what warranted those kind of reactions. So, I try to be as clear n' concise as I could be, but that didn't really stop those kind of comments. I realized that it wasn't really how I was sayin' it, but the social expectation being placed upon me. If me—a masculine lookin' guy—is givin' a woman a compliment, I must be doin' it because I wanna fuck 'em? ... Huh?
I remember goin' to an anime convention with some friends some years back (pre-Covid) n' took pics with a lot of cool n' cute cosplayers. I have a distinct memory of where I saw these two female cosplayers who were moogles from Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles (that's my only frame of references for them) n' I wanted to get a picture of 'em since I thought they were cute. Though, I noticed they were in the middle of photo shoot with a group of guys. So, I left to do other things n' came back after they were done to ask for pics. Got my pics from 'em then exchanged pleasantries. As I was leavin', I saw the group of dudes they were with give me the nastiest stink eye. I could see they said somethin' under their breath. Dunno what, but nothin' good probs lol.
I never understood, at the time, why there we lookin' at me like that. I think they might've seen me as a threat? Threat as to what exactly? Maybe one of the moogles was dating one of the guys, so my only guess is they thought I was tryin' hit on their gf? I dunno. Like, I have no interest in bein' a homewrecker lol.
I try to be as genuine as I can without expectin' a lot in return. The most I honestly expect is just a "thank you." So, it's always been bizarre to me—at least among some straight peeps I've interacted with—that compliments are seen as some attempt to get in someone's pants. I mean, sure there's people out there with those kind of intentions, but like... it seems tirin' to me to micro analyze every compliment like that.
Like, a compliment can just be compliment my guy.
