The Internet™ needs its own epoch, and I float the idea of making Eternal September official in this role. Today is September 10,909th, 1993. I was born on September 1,793rd, 1993. See how simple it is? We could even ditch the 'September' and '1993' parts!
Fuck it, just have a second UNIX millisecond timestamp originating at 00:00 1993-09-01.