there are certain moments in games that when invoked, take the reader back to the moment they first experienced it. the baby Metroid; Snake's ladder climb; and perhaps most memorable of all, the Spelunker elevator.
what do you mean "shut up dork"? YOU know what i'm talking about:
this moment comes literally 2 seconds after pressing start to begin the game. years of precedent tell you that your character can clear a 1 millimeter gap by simply walking over it, but Spelunker is here to remove the comforting lies you were told: welcome to the real world motherfucker. EVERYONE dies here their first time playing, there are no exceptions.
spelunker is a legendary kusoge (crap game) for a lot of reasons: the repetitive and silly BGM, the brutal difficulty and the Spelunker himself, one of the most fragile and inept video game protagonists i've ever seen in my life. there's an often-repeated bit of trivia that Spelunker was such a cultural touchstone in Japan that it spawned the expression "Spelunker's constitution", typically referring to athletes who are easily injured by trivial things.
SO, you fall off the fucking elevator. you're probably going to do it again in about one second because upon death, Spelunker will respawn quickly and without fanfare at the very edge of the platform he fell off of, making it hilariously easy to repeat fatal mistakes once or even twice more.
when Spelunker jumps, he's locked into the height and trajectory so if you made a positioning mistake there is no mid-air correction a la Super Mario. if he falls roughly 4/5ths his height, he dies instantly, and you don't even get the catharsis of seeing him hit the ground! he just freezes in midair like an idiot. if a bat shits on him, he dies. if he sets off fireworks (to scare bats) and they fall back onto him, he dies. if he uses his gun to defeat a ghost his air supply plummets (guess what happens when it runs out). he dies a lot
for these reasons and more Spelunker is known as a kusoge and the patron saint of the bargain bin in Japan. calling it such is funny but i just don't agree with it. Spelunker is not a bad game, it's a deliberate game. it runs on harsh but internally consistent rules that are reinforced clearly and early; as early as the first couple of seconds. is Ghouls and Ghosts a bad game for its bottomless pits and locked-in jump trajectory? how about Castlevania?
Spelunker is fun okay! it's just difficult, unorthodox and a little absurd. you can certainly not like it, but it's learnable and rewarding and honestly thrilling once you're just good enough to start blazing through the obstacles while still dealing with the randomly appearing ghosts and constantly depleting air supply. i urge you to give it a fair shake and you might fall in love with it; or, try another game commonly considered to be bad! there's something redeeming in almost any game.
also, if there's an unpopular or infamous game you love please tell me what you love about it!
