Honeysizzle [parallel arc]

feeling left out. every single other company is announcing the stupidest, most hostile shit in the world today to try and bury it under the apple event. i wanna announce something stupid and hostile too. let me know what y'all would like to see. some ideas i'm floating include "publicly executing eggbug" but i'm open to suggestions here.

Publicly visible metrics on posts, but only for users with over 1000 followers

Every post displays a list of users who scrolled by it without interacting

Actually, you know what? Customized age range visibility. Down to the day. This means if you're willing to do a lot of work your post could be only visible to, say, libras in their 20s.

Login requires ASSC Pledge of Allegiance. Copy-pasting or using a password manager will get you flagged as a bot.

Infinite scroll combined with feature where user inactivity triggers an animation of eggbug dying horrifically

Public figures can apply for a verified account but they have to share it with one randomly selected user who they cannot contact directly

Guidelines on allowable drawn pornography determined by penile plethysmograph

Gender of exposed nipples determined by penile plethysmograph

me & @artemis wrote twilight x celestia cg/l ship fic together. with horse weed. (it was mostly them who wrote most of it, tbh)

"practice for half an hour a day" sounds like a completely reasonable way to improve at things until i think about how many things i want to be doing and want to be doing well and want to be doing now