I was very afraid of how folks would respond to what I said (for many reasons) and as a result I developed a habit of structuring all sentences and statements in a way that doesn't leave a lot of space for responses.
It's funny to me because I think some folks read my longer posts and think, "oh, cool, you can write in a way that feels like presenting". Nope, this is just how I talk 90% of the time.
Why bring this up? Well, I think it served me well for a few decades, especially because I was a) surrounded by idiots b) no really, complete idiots and c) why couldn't anyone in my life have just been unreservedly okay with me being trans?
...anyway...
These days I find myself surrounded by enough folks who are understanding that not only do I want to be more open with them, but I frankly also care much less about what all the idiots I know think about what I'm saying (ie., I am not desperate for their validation any longer).
But habits die hard :|. Hopefully some day I'll get better at posting my thoughts in a way that invites comment, but I don't think that day is today.
