previously: stretchtember

⚠️ PRODUCT SAFETY NOTICE ⚠️
Here at Pear, Inc, we know how much customers love our Athena voice assistant. They tell us how much they love setting timers, adding reminders, and turning their lights off.

What you may not know is that powering Athena is a fleet of living supercomputers, which we also call ATHENA (Animate Technological High Efficiency Neural Aggregator), large enough to deal with the millions of user queries every day.

This particular ATHENA unit has been illegally jailbroken by an unknown source (though we have a hunch).

Should you see xem, please contact Pear, Inc Technical Support immediately.
The unit should be considered dangerous; please do not approach.

Additionally, please do not use "Hey Athena" in xyr presence as xey may be able to intercept the command. These interactions are not covered under the Pear, Inc. Privacy Policy.

avatar base by [ghostly]https://ghostly.gumroad.com, edits + ref by me