Librarianon

I think it makes sense. It's not easy though, most of this stuff is figured out through years of self exploration and experimentation and preferably with folk you are comfortable with, some get it done in thier teenage years. Others are still figuring it out into thier later life. There's no easy answer other than What feels comfortable to you at the time.

Nah, totally dude, I'm basically the same except for the one intimate partner. Big ole goose-egg over here. Couple that with being non-binary(?)/pansexual(??) and autistic, I don't have a CLUE what's going on with me. I mostly just try to take it day by day and try and expand what I'm comfortable with at a comfortable rate. If I ever reach a road block I'll just say, "Guess that's not for me." And move on. I think trying to put a specific label on it is just asking for a headache and you should just focus on what YOU like and communicate that and try and keep an open mind while asserting your boundaries. It's tough, but simpler that way. All that really matters is open and honest communication.

I kind of understand the feeling. Even though my parents were fairly open-minded, I never bothered with sexual relationships during high school and college. Now, I'm an adult and don't know where to start. It's even harder that I can't maintain long-term friendships. Best you can do is figure out your comfort level.

A lot of this is sounding very familiar to me and I struggled to define myself in sexual terms for a really long time due to my own weird combination of issues. I generally refer to myself now as an Aegosexual with strong sensual desires and strong aesthetic and sensual attraction to others. Sex in fantasy, at least with specific circumstances, is something I'm very interested in. In reality however, I find the idea completely unappealing. I didn't understand this for a long time due to my strong sensual desire however, as I misinterpreted that as something sexual. I also like pleasing people and love teasing friends by pushing their buttons which, combined with my lurid writing, likely makes people think I'm personally hyper-sexual when I'm not.

I've never had a romantic or sexual relationship so I didn't have any real world info on what my deal was for a very long time and only discovered a way to describe myself due to reading other people talk about it on here and then doing research on it. It's okay if you don't find a solid way to describe yourself regarding your sexuality so long as you respect your own feelings and don't try to push yourself into situations that you're actually uncomfortable in to adhere to unrealistic concepts of "normalcy". Researching and talking to others can lead to ways to accurately describe yourself though, which may bring comfort. Regardless, I hope you gain a fuller understanding of your preferences and boundaries and find comfort in yourself. ^u^

If it's any help my wife came out as non binary wich sent me into a whole spiral of questioning my sexuality since I guess that made me not straight and after like a month of sitting on it I came to the conclusion it doesn't, really matter?

Like if a label provides you a sense of identity or community cool, embrace that for sure, but if none of the labels fit, then that's cool too. You don't need to fit yourself into a box.

I didn't grow up in a sex negative environment but I really relate it feels easier to please other thzn indulge yourself