sometimes i think about choices ive made and rarely these days hate myself about them anymore but also my trajectory was set more than anything by my parents deciding to get cable, and therefore always-on, internet service. it was all over right there. once computers were good enough to be everywhere, my brain disintegrated. sometimes i wonder if one of the net effects of social media is basically like irradiating peoples fucking brains and thats why we all are the way we are, then i remember i am a frog at the bottom of a very deep well eating fried chicken and everything exists so far away from my life and grasp that it might as well be the shapes of the stars
we live surrounded by shadows we are forced to regard as meat and it makes us all a little fucked up because there are things we have to be trained into thinking are wrong. nobody is okay.