Lizstar

Gay Murr Girl

Liz, Goblin, Part-Time Shark, VTuber, retired speedrunner, author, GDQ staff, Sega fan, "Yuri Sommelier", Walking Encyclopedia of All Things Useless, Twitch partner, general menace. Says "Murr" a lot. This is not a place of honor, views my own, etc. Avatar art by me.


Every Sunday my Twitch subs and I watch Star Trek in my Discord. Here are my reviews and thoughts on each of the episodes as I see it. If you're curious about a nerd's views on Star Trek episodes, please read on, I go quite in depth with some of these episodes! I've watched some Star Trek before but not all of it!


Rejoined - DS9
8.5/10

trek

This one is a version special one for people like me. Y'know, Dax fans. And nothing else.

Dax is doing Dax things and being cool, pulling latinum out of Quark's ear

trek

when Sisko calls her to his office, somberly. A Lenara Khan is coming to DS9 to do some work on an artificial wormhole, and he offers Dax a vacation to escape from her. Are they enemies? No. They are ex-wives.

You see, one of Jadzia Dax's previous hosts was married to one of Lenara Khan's previous hosts. They are both different people and also the same now, and they might still harbor feelings for each other. But it's a taboo in Trill society to continue a relationship after rejoining. Breaking this taboo has resulted in exile from Trill Society, which means death for a symbiont once the Trill Host dies. So uh, that's bad.

They're both grown adults, they can do it though! Instead, they'll gaze gayly at each other from across the room. They can handle it!

They are not gonna handle it.

trek

A lot of this episode is like, long stares and slow turns, as they clearly make decisions their heart wants but they know is a bad idea because society tells them it's bad. I wonder what this episode is an allusion and allegory towards. Huh!

Eventually they take that first step and get closer, and hit it off as friends! :D Oh what good friends these two women are. Dax invites her out for dinner, but asks Bashir to be a chaperone. And Bashir is a good friend, so he comes.

trek

Poor Bashir.

There's some comments here that are interesting. "We actually have more in common now than we did when we were married". Unfortunately, Khan's brother is CREEPING on them, and sees them alone once Bashir leaves. I'm sure he's getting the wrong idea, they're just gals being pals! When her brother confronts her she gets offended. Yeah, how dare you think she'd still have feelings!

trek

Okay actually I'm starting to think I might be the one in the wrong

trek

Hey I think these bitches gay.

Or well, not gay. Actually fuck it, it's gay. Gender doesn't mean jack shit to a Trill, every Trill is gay.

This is interesting. No one is bothered cause it's gay. Fuck, MOST people aren't bothered AT ALL. Like, logically, there's nothing about this??? It's a societal thing, and it's kinda stupid, but that's how society is. Her friends are all down to back her. But society won't. The symbionts WILL die, if they pursue this.

The experiments go poorly, and the Defiant almost explodes. Dax risks her life to save Lenara. Also Eddington is still here. Remember Eddington???? Why is he still here?? Didn't Worf basically take his job?

trek

So, why does this work and not any of the other times they've tried a romantic Dax thing? Well, these characters have chemistry. The acting is really on point here. The longing looks, the passion, it's on fire. And unfortunately, that same passion ends as brightly as it began. Lenara is like "I'll go back to Trill, think us over..." but, they know that it won't work out, and thus they leave with the same teary sad gay glances from across the room that they started with.

But hey at least we got a gay kiss out of it.

Starship Down - DS9
9/10

trek

Remember seasons ago, when a trade agreement was made with a Gamma Quadrant species, the Karemma, with the Ferengi as intermediaries? Well uh, that's being cancelled. Why? Why, all the taxes and surcharges! (It's Quark's fault, he's embezzeling money. What a shocker) Meanwhile, it's the anniversary of the Emissary's arrival, a massive holiday on Bajor! And Sisko scheduled this meeting today just to avoid it.

Oh no, the Jem'Hadar are here! They attack the Karemma, as retribution for dealing with the Federation. Seems a bit harsh, but okay. They go to hide in a gas giant, the Jem'Hadar give chase, and the Defiant follows as well. Time for a Submarine episode! Using some of Kira's old strategies, they use echo-location to find the other ships, but are hit by the Jem'Hadar (It is VERY annoying to write Jem Hadar every time lol) and they lose both phasers and impulse power, and are falling down into the gas giant.

They're trying to fix that, but also at the same time Sisko is like "we'll need to defend ourselves, turn the probes into nukes". Uh, shouldn't we try and fix the altitude issue first? "You have ten minutes to make me nukes, Sisko" They literally told you the ship will crunch like a soda can in 6 minutes dog. They fix it, but not in time. Dax and Bashir are stuck in a sealed off section of the hull, open to the atmosphere, and can't contact the bridge. Everyone assumes they're dead.

trek

They blow up one of the enemies, but are fired upon and the bridge fucking explodes. Half the people there die, leaving an Ensign we first saw today and all the main characters. Sisko is severely injured, and might die if Kira can't keep him awake and they can't find a medic. Unfortunately Bashir is locked in a closet with Dax (please, Bashir, everyone can how you are with Garrak).

Also there's a bunch of scenes with the Karemma and Quark arguing with each other about how Quark cheated him, while they also comment on how they're probably about to fucking die.

trek

The episode thus becomes a few small contained storylines. Bashir and Dax are running out of air in an elevator. Worf is down with the Engineers being a hardass and O'Brien has to teach him to not treat people like garbage. Kira learns that though she considers Sisko a friend, she treats him so distantly cause of both work and also him being Jesus, and all they can talk about is work. And most interestingly, a fucking torpedo slams into Quark's room, and he has to figure out how to diffuse it before it explodes.

trek

Eventually, it all works out. The Karemma gets into gambling, Worf treats his crew members like human beings, Bashir and Dax are alive. And, most importantly, Sisko gets Kira into baseball, and they hang out.

trek

It's kind of a sequel to Disaster from TNG, in a way. It's cute! All the threads are fun little storylines (the Bashir and Dax one was maybe the weakest), and it's got some great character moments.

Little Green Men - DS9
10/10

trek

THIS. THIS IS ONE OF THE BIG ONES.

Nog is going off to the Acadamy, and Rom is helping run the auction that will finance him getting there! It's a Ferengi tradition. Quark comes to drag Rom away though, because his cousin just sent him a starship that he's been owed for a DECADE. It's finally here, Quark's own ship. Rom gives it a once over, it looks good, so to test it they'll take a day trip to Earth to take Rom to the Academy... and, not to mention all the contraband stored in its hull, ohohoho. Oh, that Quark.

Nog and Jake have a sweet scene as Nog leaves. "It feels like we spent the past several years just doing nothing" "I can't imagine someone I'd rather do nothing with!" Dudes rock. Rom is given a guide to Earth. I'm sure that won't be helpful.

Unfortunately, Quark's Cousin Gaela sabotaged the ship, and Rom has to do some Wild Engineer Shit to fix it. Did you know Rom is actually a fucking genius, but he's just an anxious wreck with no self esteem. Uh, turns out though it didn't work. Quark wakes up locked in a room with the others. Where could they be?

trek

So, they're in 1947, in Roswell Mexico. They're in the possession of the US military. What proceeds is fucking HILARIOUS. Rom knows everything about the history, but is seeing it from the outside. So he's making comments like "Oh yeah they used to nuke themselves all the time" while Quark is like "...they IRRADIATED THEIR OWN PLANET?!" or the classic "Yeah that's Tobacco. It's poison." "They BREATH IN POISON?" "Yeah it's addictive." "Where do they get it???" "They buy it" "They BUY POISON?!"

I'm having trouble writing this because I just wanna watch the god damn episode.

trek

Lots of really fun things happen. There two humans, a scientist and a nurse, who are hopeful and nice. The others are military shitheads. Quark has plans... he's going to take advantage of how primative hu-mans are savage assholes, and make a profit selling future technology. Unfortunately, the military isn't buying it. They KNOW they're planning something. Y'know, EXTREMELY accurate 40s military jingoistic assholes.

ODO WAS THE DOG, TAKE A DRINK! Odo smuggled onto the ship to bag Quark for smuggling. He's here to take them back to the future though. Quark REFUSES to go, but uh, after being tortured by the military, he's down for it. How are they gonna get out of this one? Nog pretends that they're going to invade CLEVELAND, the good hu-mans help them escape, and it's so fucking fun. It's REALLY fun to watch them lean into being invaders.

"STAND BACK, OR I'LL VAPORIZE THIS HOSTAGE!" "With your finger???" "With my death ray."

trek

They make it back to the future. The Hu-man Female is like "I hope we can join you in the stars some day, and join in a federation of other planets in peace!" A little on the nose there hun. And the military is like "....we'll cover this up. It was all just a weather balloon."

Fucking AMAZING episode.

The Sword of Kahless - DS9
3.5/10

trek

KOR IS BACK! I loved the other episode he was in, so I'm SO hype he's back again. He's getting schwifty with Dax in the bar and telling old war stories. Dax wants to introduce him to Worf, but Worf is like "But I am an outcast and a traitor!" Dax says that's ridiculous, and introduces them, and Kor is like "Oh, YOU. The TRAITOR. SO GOOD TO MEET YOU :D" Apparently he doesn't like Gowron or the High Council all that much.

trek

See, Kor has an old tapestry that might have held Kahless' bathleth at one point, and they need to go find it!! It's return will be GLORIOUS. Apparently centuries ago, the Hur'q, a species from the Gamma Quadrant, came and pillaged the Klingons, and took their artifacts. Now they're dead, and the artifacts have never been found. Time to find the most famous one! :D Worf, Dax, and Kor are heading off!

Oh and Kor is attacked by some kind of demon-lookin mother fucker, and his brain electrified. I'm sure that won't be important.

trek

Unfortunately, by the time they make it to the Hur'q artifact chamber, it appears to have been stolen. Dax figures out some science fuckery though, and they find the REAL chamber and the Bat'leth! Though uh oh, Toral Duras is here!! He has the Lethean steal Kor's thoughts to lead them here, and he'll use the Batleth to forge a new Empire! Cause that worked so god damn well for the Duras all the other times.

After escaping, Kor learns about how Worf retused his right of vengeance and didn't kill Toral before. Ugh, he's PATHETIC. NOT EVEN A TRUE KLINGON! And now, we get to the portion where Kor is a fucking asshole. He trearts Worf like dogshit, and it now becomes clear that he's going to use the sword HIMSELF to become emperor. Hmm. Not sure that's a good idea.

trek

And while talking to Dax, Worf talks about how actually HE should have the sword and HE should be the one to lead his people!!! Ah. This shit is corrupting. Worf even tries to use Kore SLIPPING AND FALLING IN A PIT as a way of easily getting rid of him. Dax is FED UP With this shit, and takes the sword. SHE will carry the sword to mordor.

Worf and Kor are about to fucking hill each other when Toral's group catches up with them. They fight, and win, but then they turn on each other and fight to the death. Dax is fucking fed up, and shoots them both. You go, girl.

They decide that this was fucking stupid, and jettison the god damn thing into space. It was their destiny to find it, but not to keep it. Boom, it's floating in space now. "Our people are not ready".

I kind of did not like this episode. It was fine until they got the sword, then it was annoying and everyone was out of character. Worf wouldn't just fucking murder Kor, that's fucking stupid. At least Dax was great.

Our Man Bashir - DS9
10/10

trek

Bashir is playing out a secret agent fantasy in the holo suite, when he's interrupted by Garak, and is EXTREMELY unhappy about it. But FINE, he'll let his boyfriend join him in his james bond fantasy.

trek

"Nice tux" "Thank you!" "Now get out."

Meanwhile, the rest of the command staff is on a single runabout that's been sabatoged and it fucking explodes. Eddington tries to beam them off but the explosion makes his transporters fuse. The transporter buffers are gonna degrade, and they need to save it. So they just erase random data and shove them into it. Where do they end up?

trek

Exactly where you'd expect.

Can you believe the actors fucking LOVED shooting this episode? It's like a completely different fucking show. So, all of the senior staff are in this james bond program. And, due to shenanigans, if any of them die, they are erased from the program, so the actual staff die too. AND the safeties are off. Because of course they are. This makes it tricky when one of them is an assassin who's after Bashir's head.

trek

The show becomes two halves. We have Wet Blanket Eddington, Odo, and Rom joins us as our Backup O'Brien. The other half is a fucking amazing James Bond pastiche, which Garrak keeps making fun of because, remember, HE IS AN ACTUAL FUCKING SPY. This is fucking hilarious on multiple layers. He's sitting back and being Waldorf AND Statler.

The villain's plan is so stupid, in a way that's perfectly Bondy. Lasers that will cause molten rock to form, and will cause the earth to shrink, causing the waters to rise and make an island in the Himalayas, a perfect island paradise. It's so stupid. I love it.

trek

Garrak has had ENOUGH, and is going to exit the program. So Bashir fucking shoots him. Just a flesh wound, but.... can you tell if he MISSED or not?~

Sisko is the perfect bond villain btw. Bashir wins in the end by letting the villain win, which keeps them monologuing JUST long enough to let Rom fix everything.

This episode was REALLY FUCKING FUN. VERY goofy. Apparently, they ran afoul of the James Bond people, and almost got sued over this god damn episode. Stupid fucking MGM. This episode whips.


You must log in to comment.

in reply to @Lizstar's post: