I think this post is pretty correct in that diagnosis.
That is why fandom spaces become so
harsh
in maintaining their acceptable orthodoxy.
Why it must be liking the right thing the right way.
Why many treat identities also as fandom camps.
Everything must be correct and acceptable. Social backlash is harsh.
Kids have no space in which to be free. Online or off. It is constant, consistent vigilance, and taught to be self-vigilant. Not fitting in in whatever environment they are in is punished harshly.
So when they see weird adults being
weird
they freak the fuck out. That cannot be allowed.
They would not be allowed to do that in their spaces, in the environments they are in.
So they are made uncomfortable by that.
So they must make the spaces they are joining feel safe
They must make it clean and fit their comfortable acceptability.
The vibes and aesthetics must be correct
TLDR they should really learn to kill that cop in their heads and free themselves to be more
themselves
I think it is also important to consider how many spaces have become hyper aggressive about policing anything with a whiff of adult content, all in the name of "protecting kids", or how media and fascist ghouls spent years working everyone into a frenzy about a supposed epidemic of predators hiding behind every bush. (EDIT: And crucially, I think, linking these two factors within the discourse! The false correlation that anything horny on main is automatically suspected grounds for predation is huge.)
Given an environment of sufficient external pressure or even just cultural expectation, subcultures will amp up their own internal policing in response, I've seen it over and over through the years.
Amiga fans used to personally send C&Ds to ISPs over sites hosting the Workbench ROMs, fanficcers will literally stalk new works and yell at you if you so much as say the word Ko-fi, Tumblr has a whole history of self-appointed "pedo" hunters collabing with cesspits like KF, there's been all kinds of weird shit that came and went over the years in other fandom spaces.
And it becomes self-reinforcing, starting as "we have to stamp this out to protect us from the normies" to "we have to stamp this out to protect us from each other" so fast.
But at the top it's all just reflecting the environment they've been raised in, that treats sexuality as a worse crime than violence, and teaches them to relentlessly fear the other. Of course they've turned out that way.
This is starting to remind me of former cult members trying to adjust to a life that isn't micro-managed at every level.
