Hannah

Felt restless tonight. Frustrated. Many hateful thoughts about myself, and where I am in my life. Had a desperate need to get out of the house, go somewhere, do something. But there aren't many options here. I'm not yet desperate enough to brave the cishet bars. Eventually I just stepped out into the night and walked down the street.

I like to look at the stars. The night sky is slightly mesmerizing. Mother Moon was hidden, but that was alright. The stars were enough. There were clouds moving fast across the sky, their distant edges illuminated by city lights.
When I reached the end of my street, I stopped. I paced around the intersection, silent and dark. A memory came to me of a friend, relating how she had walked naked through an isolated trail one night, and felt free and whole. I am not distant enough from civilization to risk shedding all my clothes, but I took off my shirt and let the night witness as much of me as I could. A breeze came through to caress me, the night showing me her appreciation, acknowledging my offering. I am her creature. Perhaps I have always been. No matter what, she will always hold me in her embrace. Sometimes that is enough.