bell-chimes-in
@bell-chimes-in

"I'm standing at the gates of the city of Omelas. For years now, people have been arguing about the morality of this city's utterly unique infrastructural setup. Now, I'm not going to get into that debate just yet - but stick around, we will get there. First, I'm going to be getting a tour of the city - which, as you probably know, is famous for being an allegedly perfect utopia made possible, inexplicably, by the unspeakable suffering of one small child...and I'm going to meet him."


bell-chimes-in
@bell-chimes-in

"So that's that! Thank you once again to my hosts and guides, and to the suffering child for the opportunity to speak with him. Let me know your thoughts about this place in the comments. Do try to be polite about it. But as for me?

It's time for me to walk away." [thirty seconds of crunching footsteps moving away from the fixed camera]



Gadfly-Goods
@Gadfly-Goods

[Interior shot of the plain DOOR of the PIT ROOM. Sound effects of GUARDS outside Wilhelm-screaming and getting beat up can be heard.]

[Our heroes bust open the door to the PIT ROOM]

PROT A. GONIST: Piece of cake.

DOOT R. GONIST: Heh. You think they would hire more guards for how important this place is.

[Establishing shot of the interior of the PIT room. The camera pans across the flithy DIRT FLOOR, up to the UNSETTLING MOPS in the corner, across a wall where the words I'M SUFFERING are written in smeared letters, and then finally back down to the CHILD, face down and in a fetal position.]

DOOT (whispering): Are you sure we should do this? We're not supposed to say anything to the child.

PROT (epically): Well, that's we came here to do, right?

DOOT: If you say so...

[PROT nervously approaches trembling THE CHILD, who is making weird breathing noises, and then gently places his hand on his shoulder]

PROT: It's okay little guy. We're here to rescue you.

[THE CHILD slowly turns his head towards the camera, revealing a full, healthy, bearded, adult face. The face is of none other than JESUS OF NAZARETH.]

URSULA K LE GUIN (from beyond the grave): What the hell?

JESUS: Know ye not that it is meet for one to suffer that all might live? I have taken upon myself the sins of this people that they might have life, and that they might have it abundantly. Verily, verily, I am the very foundation and rock upon which this city is built.

DOOT (keanuly): Whoah.

LE GUIN: What are you talking about? The people in this city do drugs and have orgies.

JESUS: Go ye forth from here, and walk away from Omelas preaching this Gospel unto the ends of the earth.

PROT (amazed): Whatever you say, man.

LE GUIN: THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!

THE POPE: This is canon.