The second half of this year kicked off a stretch of physical and mental decline that really sped up since about November. pair this with the isolation of living really far away from anyone who cares about me. now add a professional environment that demands more growth, more micromanaged Data Driven Insights, and a high turnover rate and uh

it does not go well!

the sad thing is I know exactly what I want to do, and what I should do. I see it all with so much heartbreaking clarity, I know the steps that a better, more alert, more supported version of myself would take to thrive. but I'm so tired. all I want to do is listen to friendly voices until I fall asleep. all I get to do is manage unsustainable demands at work, fill out time cards, fill out project management report updates, attend zoom call after fucking zoom call

I'm so tired. may this week go swiftly and gently so I can collapse and at least try to dig myself out of this rut