the gap between someone recycling a pair of 2nd gen Airpod Pros and my discovering that the 2nd gen Airpod Pros appear to work fine at first but there is actually something broadly and deeply wrong with almost all of their other functions than "play music" that is incredibly hard to describe
- Voice recording, as it turns out, sounds like this.
- The right earphone makes a loud crackly noise when inserted in my ear, as though the ANC is trying to cancel out the air pressure change. I dismissed this as maybe happening because I used the tips from my 1st gen Airpod Pros.
- The force/touch sensitive area doesn't click until I lift my finger, which is disconcerting, but I dismissed it as maybe happening because of the 2nd gens' "slide finger to adjust volume" function. (It might still be that.)
- The "power on" sound seems lower-bitrate/resolution than it ought to be.
- Handoff does not work. They will not seamlessly switch between my Mac and my iPhone.
- The firmware doesn't seem to be upgrading from version 5E135. I had hoped a firmware upgrade would fix them.
- Apple's warranty checker states that their serial number belongs to "a product that has been replaced." How did they end up here?
My conclusion from this constellation of symptoms is that either there is something really bizarre that's defective about these, something that makes me wish I had reverse engineering skills, or that they're counterfeit, which I thought was only a problem with the 1st-gen ones. Why the hell hasn't Apple implemented some sort of signing mechanism for these?
I think I left the "original" box they came in on my desk at work. Maybe I can inspect it for clues.
- Seams on the earphones are very slightly more visible than I'd expect
- Printing on the case and airpods is a little darker than I'd expect
- Typography and text layout inside the lid is not quite right compared to eBay pictures of used 2nd gen charging cases
- Can hear indiscernable whispers behind the power on noise, and in transparency mode I can almost tell what they're saying
- Siri won't talk to me through the earphones - I try to trigger it and it says "I'm not here anymore." or "I'm gone." through the phone instead
- Charging case is warm in my pocket, like a worn stone that begs to be touched
- I need to wear the Airpods Pro and listen to the music
- I can hear the music even when they're not turned on now
- They have secrets for me and I need to hear what they have to say
- Original ear tips had no vent hole on the part that touches the airpod
