"Miss Witch?" the combat doll asked.
"Yes, dear Doll?" the Witch replied.
"This one is reporting certain, errors, in he- h- its cognitive patterns," the doll continued hesitantly.
"Hmm," the Witch pretended to ponder for a moment, just for the doll's benefit, before saying, "And what errors would these be?"
"Two days ago, when the unit was wearing the fancy dress uniforms for the event, this one... this one liked it."
"Yes?"
"This one liked the skirting of its dress, the way it swooshed around her- it. And the pretty decorative nature of the uniform overall," the doll said, seeming almost pained.
The Witch had a rather clear picture, already, of what was going on, but this would have to be handled nice and delicately. She had come to care for her combat dolls perhaps more than was standard, and this one's veiltear sabers were such a fun, clever weapons system... It would be a shame to have to decommission her should she destabilize too much.
"It is happening," the doll continued, interrupting the Witch from her thoughts, "right now, with- with the very clothes you wear. Oh, so improper! But, they are very pleasing clothes, and this one would like to wear something similar."
Looking sympathetically at the poor little doll, the Witch said, "well, what exactly is the issue? You can function perfectly fine with opinions about clothing, darling Doll."
And the doll with the veiltear sabers elaborated, "this one has started to refer to itself as 'she.' Is this not a serious defect?"
"All the best combat dolls are about 0.15 clicks defective, dear. Well, I know what you are experiencing. It would seem you've got yourself a gender," the Witch said softly and slowly.
And the doll shook, almost shouting "ewwww eww eww, no! Oh no, this one can't have a gender... It's disgusting! It's improper!"
The Witch's concern elevated. "It's not that uncommon of a thing for a doll to have. What about your squadmate with the ontological engine? She does fine with it."
"This one can't be like OE! She's, she's, ...OE! Duh," Sabers said, blushing. The doll with the experimental 'ontological engine' paraweapon was not exactly the most popular with the other dolls of the unit, having a reputation for stranger behavior than usual, but her combat capabilities drew a certain silent awe from many of the others. The doll continued, "Remove it, remove it, remove it, please! Cut and rewire and excise, make this one perfect again!"
Sighing, the Witch said, "unfortunately that won't be possible. It's naturally grown, you see. Quite entangled with the rest of you, my Sight shows me. Please, dear, you needn't worry about this situation, I'm quite all right with it."
The doll vibrated slightly, silent.
"Ah, well. You know what," the Witch continued coyly, "I am very interested to see how the situation develops, in fact. I would like regular reports on your experiences, and I'll be issuing you several styles of clothing and armor to try. Consider it... an experiment."
Sabers gasped. An experiment! That she could understand. "...Thank you Miss! This one will ensure you get good data."
The Witch walked over to her enchanted wardrobe, shuffled through it a bit, and pulled out a uniform dress. "Here you go," she said. "Be on your way, now."
And the doll ran off to change into her dress, and to brag to her squadmates that she was the subject of a new experiment.
