Me, internally responding to direct criticism from an internet rando: Hey buddy, fuck you. In fact, I did the thing you're angry about on purpose just to piss you off, and I hope you die angry about it.
Me, internally responding to modestly critical subtweets from peers: I am history's greatest monster. I mean we all knew it, but like... there it is, plainly laid out for all to see. I am a profound piece of shit and now the whole world knows it. It is time to find a small ditch to curl up in and wait for the end. There is no coming back from this.
