Sheri

its worth fighting for 🌷

Writer of word both truth and tale. Video producer, editor, artist, still human. Hire me?

Check #writeup for The Good Posts.
β€”

Slowly making a visual novel called We Will Not See Heaven, demo is free. Sometimes I stream, or post adult things. Boys' love novel enthusiast. Take care, yeah?

πŸ’ŸπŸ’ŸπŸ’Ÿ
TECH CAN ONLY BE AS KIND TO US AS WE ARE TO ONE ANOTHER.


πŸ–₯️ blog
sherishaw.net/blog

why is it that i feel so much happier when i get one really thoughtful comment on a fanfiction i wrote, than getting 10,000 views on a video essay, my actual career?

because it's my actual career, next question

wait that's a wild thing to just associate. let's break that down.

so, if you're new here, my main career is writing & video production. i make dissertations about the history of turtle rock studios, telling complicated stories with no words, game design philosophy under capitalism and why lying in court is good

i do this because youtube is a good way for independent creators to get paid, it requires a lot of skills i had already built up for fun working on my computer growing up, and video games are fun! and there's a lot to say about the way they're made and the people who make them.

i've got "side hustles" and stuff but the point of this is to say, a lot of the creative output in my life will be monetary in the end. it will be career based.

so, the drawings i make for tabletop campaigns? the food i cook for my friends? the kind words i hear from those close to me, or even strangers in the comments on that smut i wrote, that's good stuff

i feel better because it's not expected. never assumed.

my career as a "content creator" only works if people like me, if i continue to output writings or videos or onlyfans pics that people approve of, give me money for.

if i get no response or a constant negative one than my career has either failed, or i need to pivot to making crime boss: rockay city videos or whatever

and if i get a positive response? i simply feel relief. not unhappy, but not by default happy

the serotonin in the off hours is never accounted for and thus always a delight, since it's all been converted to US currency during the day


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in reply to @Sheri's post:

For real, it's been a while since I started following you here on Cohost and watching youtube essayist is like 80% of what I do, but I didn't know you were one until today. Sorry about that, I guess I have bad attention.
And yeah, the profit incentive can ruin fun.