i've had a tradition since i picked up drawing of labeling my art in a folder for each year, along with a theme. i try to decide on the energy i intend to bring to the year, and overall my goals for improvement of my work and myself.
some of these are pretty self explanatory. while starting off for just the purposes of art, these wind up holding more meaning in their intent. 2021 was not only me learning new aspects of art, but also starting HRT. 2022 i wrote over 200,000 words, drew over 100 CGs, and coded a good 8 or 9 hours worth of my visual novel, We Will Not See Heaven
i intended to release it last year but, you know. making games is hard.
so what is the year of the controlled burn?
it means stabilizing orbit. i found a lot of good friends, had a lot of sex, and smoked a lot of weed in my year outside of god's gaze. now its time to settle into things
im gonna be 26 years old, its time to stop doing some stupid shit but start doing more other, stupider shit
i cant chug an entire 2 liter of coke at 3 in the morning anymore, that part has been knocked off the rocket to stabilize orbit. but i'm keeping the kush.
anyways, controlled burn has another meaning too. to remove unnecessary or dangerous brush to stop a whole forest from burning down during a heat wave or forest fire
i intend to shed some excess weight, cut out parts of my life that are hanging to me like dead branches begging to catch alight. my boyfriend and i want our own place together, just the two of us. no more roommates. i finally cut my grandmother out of my life. i've stopped letting it slide when people misgender me in public.
its 2023, the year of the controlled burn. of finding stability by burning away the unneeded shit. and keeping what's important. my loved ones, my friends, my immediate family. good times, gifts, good drinks and playing video games. playing dnd and laughing along to the stories we tell. life is about enjoying the people you love, not about waiting around for the people who refuse to love you to catch up
a controlled burn will give me stability, hopefully