Silver Stars

i spent all of yesterday and today preparing for friendsgiving today (mostly cleaning the dining area and living room area which were just covered in junk) and then i ruined it by leaving the chicken out to thaw for way too long. i hate being bad at cooking and making such ridiculous mistakes, like, thinking back, obviously raw chicken shouldn't be out for that long and shouldn't get not-cold, but i just wasn't thinking about how meat can go bad if it's warm too long bc i was thinking really hard about how i wanted to make sure it was thawed by the time my partner was ready to cook so we had enough time to cook it. but i wasn't expecting my partner to not be ready to cook until 5pm so i'd never like asked how long it should be thawing i was just in waiting mode. it sucks that i put in so much work and still managed to fuck up the one most important thing. especially sucks because my partner loves cooking but never does it anymore bc their body hurts too much but they were actually gonna cook today and i ruined it by not having basic cooking skills. i HATE meat it's so scary it's so easy to make it not good, both from a "yummy" perspective and a "health and safety" perspective. and now we're supposed to be having a big gathering soon and im so so sad