I'm writing a thing that involves many little vignettes, and coming up with various pairs of characters to shove in it has been fun. Some broad ones so far are
- Beleagured professional trying to do their job while a drunken mess hits on them
- Famous and skilled exemplar being attended to by a companion who's trying, but failing, to hide how starstruck they are
- Insecure brat who doesn't know how to handle someone who is as obsessed with them as they claim everyone is
- Pair of family members having a pleasant but tense trip as they ignore the elephant in the room
- Dirtbag angel who's roommates with an overly fastidious demon
If you want a sneak peek of a goblin being hit on and having none of it, read on...
Once upon a time
Haddy Nuff called upon all his authority and confidence to declare "Last orders".
"Arrh… already?" said Elerial Highchild, more coherent than he had any right to be with the amount of drained glasses around the table. Allegedly elves had a high tolerance for alcohol, but there was only one drinking elf Haddy knew. And even that was one too many.
"Yup," replied Haddy. He was wiping down the counter again. He'd long since run out of real work to do, and was struggling to even think of fake jobs to do.
"Guess you've got to get home to your wife," Elerial stated his question, leaving a long silence as he took a big gulp from the dregs of his glass.
Haddy gave the briefest twitch of his head, to ensure nothing resembling an answer could be read from it.
"Or your husband," Elerial's most prominent quality was certainly his persistence. It was so prominent it was liable to take a person's eye out, "Partner, or… vow of celibacy?"
"Celibacy and vowing sound more like elf things," Haddy finally spoke up, against his better judgement.
"Oh believe me, they're not," Elerial waggled his eyebrows, the same way he had practiced in the mirror every morning. It didn't look any better to goblin eyes.
Haddy walked around the bar, making a point of not noticing, "Time for you to be gettin home, come on now."
"Home? Pfff, that place with all my brethren, sistren and mis-cellanerrr…"
Even before Elerial started to wobble, Haddy could see where things were going. He was already in position to catch the elf. Despite his svelte frame, Elerial was actually very heavy, especially for a small goblin that was built to sling pints. On the night Elerial first arrived, Hadde was not ready for him, but the weeks of this nightly ritual had been solid practice. However this time Elerial resisted the help, pushing himself off, slumping into a seated position on the floor.
"Just leave me here."
Hadde readied his stern face, but there was something sobering about Elerian's expression, and he let Elerian continue.
"That place is full of people, but it's so dreadfully qqqquiet," Elerian manages to slur a 'q', impressing Haddy. But he refuses to let on any positive impressions.
"Sounds awful," is all Haddy replies in his low but clear voice.
"It! Is!" Elerial replies, banging the table with his fist. Glasses rattle all across it. He glances over them, as if only now realising how many he's had, "It's not a real silence."
Haddy cocks an eyebrow at this notion of 'real silence'.
"No-one says a word, but they sure think plenty of em. Judging, scheming, sniping. Occasional whispers in private conversations. No-one says a word but their faces speak volumes and I'm sick of it. You have the quietest face I've ever seen."
Elerial pats Haddy's cheek. His barkeep senses tell him it's blatantly obvious this is a compliment that should leave him blushing. He is unphased as he returns Elerial's stray hand back to his unfinished glass.
"I've called last orders," Haddy declares, as if for the record. Elerial nods hiding his face as he gets ready to leave, but the goblin hadn't finished, "Sit."
Elerial did. He would later claim that only the alcohol prevented him being embarassed for this unquestioning obedience. However he would've done exactly the same sober. And Haddy would never judge him either way.
"Don't you-"
Haddy interrupts, "It's customary in my culture to entertain guests honoured enough to stay after last orders."
"Goblin culture?"
"Barmen."
"Ok but you've never done this before."
"It's customary in my culture to make up customs as you see fit."
"Barmen culture?"
"Goblins. How would you be entertained?"
Elerial sobers up, treating the question with a seriousness nobody else would find warranted. Nobody except Haddy, that is.
"I've never heard you talk so much at once," Elerial muses, pleased at this revelation, "Tell me a story."
"Story? Mm," Haddy started gathering up glasses. Working always helped him with thinking. Elerial started to help, making the job take longer, "What kind do you like?"
"The kind you tell," Elerial replied saccharine. A claim that would be too sweet if it was a lie, and is so much more so for being true.
"Alrigh'. Got one...
