• She/They/He

Queer trans vers🏳️‍🌈⚧, 20

Please feel free to ask me about books/movies/music, I like I’d love to talk but bad at starting conversations, they_mbtha_10671 on discord!

Also open to horny talk and asks, just keep it light :)



Voxandra
@Voxandra

I'm so tired of "egg culture" and egg jokes in general. That was the kinda shit that made me uncomfortable when I was young and the pressure I was getting from "friends" that made me run from being trans until I was 25. Sure, things were different many years ago, but it still sucks and I likely would have transitioned much sooner if it weren't for those people who were, ultimately, assholes.

People say "it's just jokes" but the jokes are always "if you wash your ass you're gay" but with different framing. "If you take care of your hair" and a picture of an egg. How is that funny? What's next, if you play Fallout New Vegas? How is that relatable to being trans at all? It sucks, isn't funny, and I'm not looking forward to when I have to put my foot down during a stream when someone makes an awful egg joke in my chat and I get a hate campaign against me for being some sort of traitor all because I hate seeing shit that reminds me of an uncomfortable experience I had.

If you're gonna use the egg shit at least make it about yourself, or make it actually relatable in any way and not just cis gender norms from the other side.


tinyvalor
@tinyvalor

something that really bugs me about this concept is that it's completely unfalsifiable...once a person starts thinking of someone else as an egg, how can that ever be disproven? they could say or do anything, but maybe they'll change their mind or realize something different. no matter what, there's just no way to deny that one day, there's a possibility of a person coming out as trans! as a statement that's true, but it's the kind of thinking that quickly disembarks from reality entirely

it's almost like...we're all individual people with our own experiences and journeys, and we all have to figure out the ways we're going to reckon with ourselves on our own to some degree. this kind of permeating, gossipy atmosphere is a hindrance to sincerely engaging with people who are trying to understand themselves, and being able to share ourselves and our vulnerability if necessary. i understand feeling like "i wish i'd done it earlier" and being frustrated with the things that might have made us hesitate. but there's no magic word you can say that will solve someone else's life for them


stu
@stu

as a person with a lot of qualities that people online like to describe as egg qualities i think about this a lot.

sure, i can see a world where a butterfly flapped its wings and i transitioned, but i'm honestly happy with where i am! i like being a big beardy guy who will someday resemble a santa.

on the other hand, i don't extremely love the implication that just because i am curious about gender i'm unhappy with who i am


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in reply to @Voxandra's post:

I've been out as a transgender woman for 10 years. I don't own a blahaj, I do not like the fallout series, I'm not good at coding, I can't take it away from anyone who does like those things, even if I find them a bit confusing and weird to be the sweeping stereotypical narratives. But it sounds like you've been purely hearing these things from really s***** people and I'm incredibly sorry to hear that. It's always just been this benign thing in my circles which confuses me more so than has done any harm to me personally

I do generally think most cases where I see stuff like that that people are well meaning or at least don't have bad intentions, but even if there's not bad intent behind a stereotype it's still not an acceptable behavior to engage in, and it can still cause very real harm nonetheless. A few years ago I saw a pair of people calling a cis person an egg on twitter based on something they said and I'm just like no, that's gross, regardless of what the truth of the matter is. A person's journey of internal identity is a personal, individual one.

At one point I had a friend discussing trans stuff with me and they were very persistent in the idea that I (cis woman) was an egg because I don’t wear makeup or dresses and don’t exhibit a lot of overtly feminine behavior. I didn’t say anything but it did make me mad because a. assuming trans was based on gender norms is some messed-up nonsense and b. if it wasn’t a huge amount of effort I would love to present more traditionally femme.

They later came out as trans so I figured that, at the time, they were looking for friends in the same boat and projecting. Still, don’t do that!

in reply to @tinyvalor's post:

It's a "damned if you do or don't" scenario for the person being called an egg. If they are indeed trans, it feels as if they were robbed of the joy of self-discovery, as if they are only transitioning to prove someone right. If they aren't, then that's misgendering - not as bad as a cis person misgendering a trans person but still denying someone's right to self-determination.

yeah. even if it's not coming from an intentionally malicious place, it's still a very similar kind of "i think you should be this person" that we all know we don't want to hear from somebody else