one thing that really bothers me about the way catholics[1] act is that they decide seemingly arbitrarily when something is God's work and when it is yours.
the limits of free will and God's creative authority are very blurry. if you become a doctor, that is a calling from God. if you get a scary diagnosis, that is part of God's plan for you. if you are born with a disability, that's the way God made you.
but there are some things that are, in a way that is opaque to me, not part of God's plan. case in point, if i'm transgender, that's not the way God made me. it's not part of God's plan. that's all me.
what is the difference? i say that the way the distinction is made is opaque to me, because i would really really like for there to be some theological explanation for this. i don't want it to just be bigotry. i want them to have a reason. but it doesn't make sense for me. why are some parts of self preordained from a higher power, and some are not? it can't be the way you are born, because people generally don't have cancer when they're born. it develops later in life, and that gets to be part of God's plan. but a trans identity can't be.
i don't know exactly where i'm going with this. i'm a pantheist, the beliefs of catholicism are only really important to me because of my proximity to it. i was raised catholic, most of my immediate family still is very catholic. i just don't get it.
[1]: i say all of this from the perspective of having been raised catholic. protestants may do the same thing, i don't know.