Vosyl

Black-Tailed Jackrabbit

Known Obscurant ▼ Anti-Social ▲ No Label
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Psychology & Criminology Student.
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A Trans Woman in her early thirties. I write,
draw, and even play music. An avid comicbook nerd,
a chess geek, and indie ttrpg enjoyer.
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I'm also a part-time supervillain.
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I feel like I've struggled with work ethic in a way that has let down even my most enduring friends, and it's the thing I want to overcome after beating my depression. I don't think its a lack of discipline, there is just this discrepency between what I can do and what I say I'll do as I'm an incredibly ambitious person. Yet there is only so many decisions I can make in a day, and push a stylus before I feel my inner batteries drained and needing to recharge.


Ultimately, I think the largest failing is my lack of technical ability. I never put in the hours to do studies properly, and push myself to improve my visual vocabulary, do mark-making exercises, and all the other experiments and exercises that'd cement my skills fully. Sure, I went to a vocational art school on and off for a number of years prior to covid. I was convinced I could 'learn by doing' but that only put pressure on me to put out my best work, and to achieve that I took a number of shortcuts that I've never been proud of doing (eg. tracing photos of hands rather than learning how to actually draw them) or drawing in a tedious time-consuming way like using a small brush and dotting out every edge of the cloud on a 3000x4000 canvas. As meditative as the could be none of the habits were ever going to carry me as far as I'd like, as I often got backhanded compliaments who's offense was unintential, like I did 'good' for the amount of followers I had implying after ten years of struggle, I had gotten it good with only seven-hundred followers.

I want to push myself.

For this I've started using a sketchbook, and making a reading list of the art books I've acquired over the years, along with the magazines I'll be going through from oldest to newest. All to internalize what I can and push ahead doing small, simple studies to learn the fundamentals, with the art I do want to do being tests and signposts, organized by complexity.

I'll be starting with Anatomy, back muscles, then front of torsos, thighs and legs then feet, before working down from shoulders to fingertips, then the head. Finally learning to anthropomorphize before I approach composition and perspective, and once drawing is done, I'm going to learn to digitally paint in that concept art style.

I'm committed, and I'm going to change how people feel about me and my art.


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