agentLdiddy

orange-flavored autism

  • she/they/it

hello im an orange robot wizard


Zen
@Zen

I wanna meet more Therians, I wanna get some tattoos, a partial, I wanna release games again, I wanna contribute to the furry rap scene..

I'll miss Cohost but I'm gonna keep trying to live my little life, quiet as my internet presence may become, there's so much shit I wanna be a part of and do.

Oughhh


Zen
@Zen

I get really sentimental about leaving, deeply and painfully so, because my whole life has been leaving and never staying.
I grew up on the move all around the states and Canada, couldn't settle after I'd moved out, struggled to stay on my own two feet and had countless battles just to try and establish myself in one location, so even something as mundane as leaving a social platform, one that I felt like I could comfortably settle into hits me so fuckin hard- ya birds gotta start all over again, one more time.

Home these days isn't what I pictured having when I was sleeping in hotel rooms I'd broken into, or when I was burying my head in a couch cushion trying to sleep through a tough night.

Home doesn't yet resemble the solid roots or foundation and familiarity of a set location that I'd expected to be able to grow myself into.
It's this collection of people and communities that I find myself in, it's in flux but it's a familiar weave that feels just as anchored as any building, just as sturdy as any family.
For all my difficulties being an active member of these places, for all the hesitations and avoidant self-isolation and terror taught to me by a lifetime of transient hardship- I still unfailingly feel a pull toward certain communities and spaces, places whose heart and soul is the very definition of home.
I owe my life to the furry community, through and through the consistent patience and love and respect kept me focused on what a real home was supposed to be and helped me to work toward that, instead of the many more awful paths that others had laid at my feet.

I'm gettin lost in the mood- the point is we'll be alright, we'll be different, but without fail we'll tie our rafts together again and I want to be around for that, weird as the in between might be for a time.

I've never written so many long form emotional pieces until cohost, it's refreshing if a little embarrassing.

Just have a lot to say about moving, I suppose.
Pack a bag, and bring it all with you to the next one, I'll see you when we get there.


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