NO.
NO, YOU FUCKING GHOULS. Your colleagues aren't "leaving" you. You're FUCKING FIRING THEM.
You fucking corpo sacks of shit can't even FIRE PEOPLE without smarmy lying to try and hide culpability for YOUR OWN ACTIONS AND DECISIONS.
Corporate abuse of the passive voice is never more obvious than during layoffs.
"Some of our colleagues will be leaving us"
"We had to make some difficult decisions."
"This change requires us to look across the business."
No agency. No sense of choice. No admission of fault, oh no. No one chose to do layoffs. The fucking layoff fairy visiting us in the night and left pink slips under our pillow so we're sharing! An evil witch has cursed me and now I'm forced to ruin lives! Except those joke examples still afford the company more agency because it implies a choice of how to use the magic. I was going for comically over the top examples of corporate denialism and accidentally took more ownership that Matt Booty has taken over ruining people's lives.
Stephanie Sterling's insistence on saying corporations are "indulging" in layoffs is a stance I heartily approve of, because that's what it is. They're choosing to destroy lives to make their quarterly numbers look better as a treat, as an indulgence. This is something they are deliberately doing and I have zero fucking tolerance for this "some of our colleagues will be leaving us" bullshit you fucking cowards.
I'm so angry over this I can't even make a joke about the name Matt Booty. It's not funny. There's nothing fucking funny happening here.
