I tend to donate if I see a post and have funds available, especially if it feels connected to something I care about in some way. Since I'm a hermit, most of the donation posts I see end up being ones that have already gained traction and are going to meet their goals or already have exceeded them, so I don't feel much need to donate there... But when I do see ones that are low or obscure, due to being a hermit again, they tend to be within the small communities I'm already a part of.
I try to actively prevent myself from worrying on "I donated too little and it won't reach the goal because I only donated what I could" because that is feeling responsible for someone else which is really unhealthy for me. I have ocd that reacts heavily to feeling responsible for others (be it their health, their lives, their emotions, etc), so I actively want to maintain a healthy relationship with responsibility... I don't want to contribute more than I feel comfortable with. From what I've seen, the issues people have in donation posts are issues that tend to be much larger than a single person (especially one who doesn't make much money themself) can fix because they are culminations of large complicated societal issues or intricate and nuanced issues or both (like... Anything with medical needs not being affordable at least in the US touches on, by definition, the history of health insurance and capitalism and how society is failing many people in that regard. It is a huge problem I'm not capable of solving on my own)...
I also remind myself that my donation is also a show of care. The end result isn't the only thing that matters... Though I understand that is hard to really believe when there are so many people in dire need... I guess I view it like "people can see that other people are trying to chip in for them." I think that's kind and also natural. I think in a less isolated and greed-encouraged society, people would form support networks where if one person is unable to meet a need, the rest of the community could help... It's sad that societal systems don't reflect this well (again, health insurance stuff, poor care for people in general at least in the US) and I try to do what I can while keeping in mind I am one person.
I try not to make it a moral struggle for myself (or ocd will take over). If i need to basically sacrifice myself to keep others afloat, it's not worth it. There's a difference to me between choosing to expend a bit of comfort (that I know I can gain back and recharge) because I want to help someone vs draining myself because I want to help someone and also think I have to and I'm a bad person if I don't.
As a result, I don't tend to donate if the donation post feels like it's trying to make me feel bad for not donating. If someone is using guilt grippy language or acting like I as the reader owe them anything and they are upset if people don't donate, that's okay and they're allowed to have those feelings because they are struggling and struggle and pain can give people really difficult emotions. They don't have to be perfect victims to deserve help. But at the same time, I need to watch out for myself, and I can't internally validate "someone made me feel bad and scared to be a bad person, so I gave them what they want" or it will flare up my responsibility/moral ocd.
I have a long history of pushing myself and sacrificing myself to help others and it... Never really would pan out. I'd just end up hurt and needing help myself, and the people who were kind would feel sad I pushed myself to breaking, because they wouldn't have wanted that, and the people who did want that did not have my care and safety in mind and ended up using me.
I guess, to put it simply, I view donation habits as linked to how healthy one's boundaries are. I'm trying to get better at boundaries, at not feeling like I have to turn in my comfort to avoid being stamped with "you're a bad person", so I try to be very stringent on that for myself. I don't view it as "triage" necessarily. I don't feel the need to make a judgment call on a choice I did not have to make (as I'm not responsible for that person), and I try to keep it that way.
I'm not sure if I've worded myself well, but I hope that it helps with what you were trying to understand about donation habits, and if you have questions, I'm open to answering!
Edit: oops, I think the repost was deleted as I was replying, so I'm not sure if it went through? If it did and I just double posted, ignore that =_=
