unfortunately one of my worst symptoms of long-term internet poisoning has not resolved with twitter collapsing into a massive black hole from which neither light nor hope can escape; and that is whenever I do extremely ordinary everyday things like washing a cast iron pan, letting my dogs off leash in the woods, or shoving a dildo without a flared base up my ass, I am cursed to think of the cohort of internet dweebs who would get foamingly mad at me if I posted about it.