Tangential to all that other stuff, I've been thinking about the purpose of shame and come to the conclusion that you cannot shame someone into being more present or more engaged, because the function of shame is to make people more withdrawn and inactive. This is why shame works when you're trying to prevent public figures from doing bad things, but it doesn't really work when you're trying to rustle up an activist base.
This would explain why traditional Asian shame-based parenting results in kids who are bad at creativity and taking initiative
