the witchy online communities we grew up on usually framed magic as taking control, but on the contrary, we have found the very best magic is all really just as much about loosing control, about learning to let go of your grip. you learn to embrace and nourish some very wonderful parts of yourself, and you learn to not let others control you, in large part by learning to lose control of certain things.
we all have spent so much time holding desperately to the consensus of the "real", of Science and Physics and making sure you seem normal and not-insane to the humans. it's a holding, a control you place yourself in continuously. the line of flight to engaging with magic is to let go of that control first and foremost, to accept that you could be Changed. that the way you see the world could Escape.
a mystical experience is a powerful thing, ecstasy being literally "outside yourself. standing there in summer staring in awe at the dandelion fluff and bugs and the creek and loosing track of who is plant and who is animal, unable to retain your sense of scientific-absolutism. with psychedelics bad trips often happen when people don't actually let go, when they try too hard to be in control. a mystical experience is a letting go. you may forget who you are, the concept of "you"and "not you" might vanish entirely. lose control. get struck by lightning.
plurality is recognizing that You are not always You. to make a headmate, something wonderful and almost holy, you must accept that you are losing some control, you are not the only one in here now. to shapeshift, you gain control of your form by letting go of that base layer of reality, that you've worked so hard to keep up even though it doesn't come natural to you because you are a strange and lovely animal in the woods at night, nipping at fireflies, earthworms inbetween your teeth. to vividly be Inside, we've found that you have to Let Go on some level. to switch, you have to Let Go. to age regress you have to Let Go.
there is no divination without the draw of the card, the throw of the discs, the swirling of tea leaves. it's a process of letting yourself be out of control, to be the Other to what the scattering of feda have to say on the matter. you cannot ask a spirit for permission if you do not learn to accept "no" for an answer. speak to things, let them take on a voice in return, spiral out into a game of play pretend with the statue.