I've been making little incomplete game projects for over 20 years, I guess longer if I count some of the QBASIC fiddling when I was very young. The last ten years has been "trying to make a game" with several Very Serious For Sure Thing projects that all die eventually. If you had asked me in 2021 why I haven't been working on games I would've told you that that was behind me, I just don't have the bandwidth in my life to suffer through the trials and tribulations that only get harder and more exhaustive the further you get.
I think about this a lot when it comes to the current endeavor. I get extremely antsy and anxious because I want it to be further along, I want to have more time to spend on it, I'm terrified of getting stuck and abandoning it as I always do.
There's so much of what I love about games poured into the design of this. I'm taking all my bullshit armchair game design ideas of what I would do if it were me and I'm just slowly chiseling it all into granite. I'm finally making something that is for me, that I'm proud of, that I would want to play.
I know I've brought this upon myself. I can't disappear into a mountain and just finish it. It's important to me to stay present and engaged in the other aspects of my life. It's going to be a couple hours a week a couple times a month.
I need to continue to find the serenity of being happy to make progress and content with the glacial pace.




