Observations from my gf upon learning that these “Bible books” she keeps hearing me yammer about are not like… some sequel to the Bible, but are actually what the Bible is made of:
Her: So I thought Matthew was this whole important book but * holding up my Bible * it’s like 50 pages! It’s a fucking pamphlet!
Her: So did you know that the Old Testament is like, really long?? * physically shows me the page where the New Testament starts and how slim the NT side is * This is nothing!! “Oh, we’re the New Testament!” It’s the new nothing! Come back when you have more to say!
Her: I think this is the first time I’ve ever picked up your Bible. Is it supposed to burn?
Her: IT’S AN ANTHOLOGY
Her: how long until this goes on Cohost?
Me: Oh, immediately.