chasejxyz

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Queer Buddhist Bird ✧ Digital Storyteller ✧ Bad Taste Haver ✧ Aspiring Home Cook ✧ Bird Fact Dispenser ✧ Third-Rate Duelist ✧ Zoid-er ✧ Furry Writer's Guild-er ✧ Codexian ✧🌹🚲 ✧ ⚦
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You can find all of my writing [here]!
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lmichet
@lmichet
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chasejxyz
@chasejxyz

A brief rundown of my writing "career":

  • Read Eragon, think, "surely, I can do that!" and write a 120K epic fantasy novel in under one year during high school
  • Immediately realized what a piece of shit it was because I had no idea what I was doing
  • Tried to re-start it several times but, again, had no idea what I was doing so the result was always "bad"
  • Stopped writing for several years
  • Got fandom brainworms, went balls-to-the-wall writing fanfiction (like 5K+ words/day)
  • Covid happens
  • Well, I got nothing better to do! Restart epic fantasy novel from scratch
  • Write 190K epic fantasy novel in under a year
  • Do so much research on The Industry but also how to improve as a writer, how to self edit, etc
  • Make myself actually sick over self-imposed deadlines, pitch events, etc
  • Spend an entire year sending out queries
  • Get exactly 0 manuscript requests
  • Start next novel with "the perfect concept" (trans werewolf monster hunter) but know it is probably too queer/furry/spicy for trade publishers
  • Get fandom-adjacent brainworms, start writing short fiction
  • Short fiction actually gets published and I make a non-0 amount on it

So for the past, like, two fucking years I've been thinking "I keep getting distracted by short fiction! I need to get back to my novel!" but I have been fucking dreading doing that because my first draft was "too short" for the debut adult fantasy market. So in this revising stage I outlined some additional chapters and some moving of pieces on the chessboard to add more words and I just know this is not good. I had to cut over fifty THOUSAND words from my first novel and you always are cutting for shorts (and ESPECIALLY flash) so adding more words for no "good" reason besides "well, it's what The Industry wants!"

And then I see this post. And then I remember seeing a writer I know post today how she got picked up by a publisher for a novella, which isn't a thing that's supposed to happen, because novellas are too short, they are not marketable.

But I know this story is marketable. I pretty much have a direct line to an editor's desk for this story because we've met and talked about it and doing community-based writing stuff. I know queer people will love it, and I know furries will love it, so I especially know cohost will love it.

It was my unpaid furry short fiction that got me a job editing a visual novel that pays decently well. It was my one very weird literary flash that got me into being considered a "professional writer" because I made enough off it.

Ever since high school, it was my dream to make my living as a writer. And I knew then it was impossible, and I know now it's mostly impossible, but the best way to do that is by publishing novels. But novels are so static, they are so ancient in their form. Any fun gimmicks or experiments would get fucking annoying across 50K+ words, both to read and to write. Working on novels always felt like I was clipping my wings to fit into someone else's box because it was how I had to be.

But I don't have to do that. That is not the only path to success, and I wouldn't want to force myself on a path that makes writing fucking miserable for me. Doing line-by-line editing and thinking about tense shifts is torture enough, but doing that makes a stronger story, I can see it happening. But I never had that happen with novels.

So thank you, @lmichet for posting this, it's what I needed to see today. I will do my coffeehouse chat with other writers and then work on revising my fucking weird autobiographical flash piece in the form of a wine list (and I fucking hate wine lol) and focus on that and not feel guilty.

And then, someday soon, I will need to take a good, hard look at the "novel" and remove all the shit I don't actually want to be there. I will stop obsessively tracking word counts, because that won't matter for this story. And it will end up in whatever form it ends up. I even know some markets that technically don't have any upper limits to the stories they take and, hey, maybe they will take a 40-50,000 word trans werewolf story lol. I believe in this story, like I believe in (most of) my stories, so I know it'll find a home, but it has to be a home that loves my writing as my writing, not a perversion of my writing for the hypothetical editor that is "the market."


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in reply to @lmichet's post:

again, preach it

(i am sort of only just shaking off The Novel myself and I feel frustrated with myself for losing so much time by being so attached to the idea for so long)

I wanted to thank you for your Deliberately Inflammatory Post actually, because just yesterday I was complaining about how I am not REALLY a writer because I have never written anything longer than 5,000 words. but here's the thing: (a) I am a hobbyist? any writing I do is perfectly "real" because I never have to sell it to anyone in order to live; and (b) I actually have always enjoyed short stories and novellas more than novels, so why should I hold myself to a higher standard than the work of authors I enjoy? lol! lmao even.

anyway great post and thanks for writing it (and this follow-up)

it was a good post and so is this one. i like the novel as a form (i am spiritually a nineteenth century loser in an attic) but being able to be analytical about WHY i like it is the actually useful thing, as is engaging with other forms, as is confronting the profit-driven reasons that we focus so much on it. so, yes, and thank you

One thing I think is interesting is that sites like Archive of Our Own and Fanfiction.net have the potential to encourage a healthier, more do-able form of distributing written fiction: posting one chapter at a time of stories of variable length with no enforced schedule.

Kind of similar to submitting short stories or chapters to monthly magazines.

It's a shame that there's no "New York Times Bestseller" equivalent of respect or sustainable career you can easily make off of digitally distributing chapters at your own pace like that. Or if there is, it doesn't have the same allure as something like "bestselling novelist."

Hi, I’m a former creative writing major that burned out hard, and while I was lucky enough to have a professor who didn’t push novels this hard (thank goodness for community colleges,) both your posts really helped me disentangle my own mindset about writing, that I can just enjoy and find value in putting out ideas in shortform, that writing doesn’t have to be days and weeks and months wracking my brain and crushing myself to put out the β€œright” kind of story.

You helped me find the joy in all this again- thank you πŸ’–

Hi, another creative writing major here that burned out hard trying to work the indie novel hustle in the late 2010s. The thing is, I don’t regret writing the novels themselves, it’s trying to sell them. It almost killed my love of writing all together. I realized a couple of things doing it: the market is incredibly over saturated, and the best way to make money with indie fiction is to sell books on how to write indie fiction. I’m not too proud to say I have a few $5 ebooks on the subject.

But the thing about hitting rock bottom was that it allowed me to figure out what I want. I was never going to be a professional novelist, in no small part because I didn’t have the Twitter following for it, RIP. I’m writing for me now, putting what I make up on Itch for pay what you want. If someone buys something, cool, if they download for free, also cool. I’m just happy to make up stories about the people that live in my head.

Also, on the AO3 thing, some of the most satisfaction I had writing in the last 4 years was writing short stories and short story collections for an obscure little fandom, just to be telling stories. I learned more in that time about what’s important about writing than a lot of what I learned in college. Ironically, novel writing was still considered a viable career when I got out of college. Two years later Amazon would open its kindle store to indie writers. We never learned about that in class.

So maybe I’m not entirely on team Fuck the Novel, but I am there, grizzled old man, to tell the Youths that there’s no money in that old abandoned mine. Hasn’t been money in novels for years. Best look elsewhere, I say, and when they look back I’m gone.

It's...conflicting, I guess? I totally see what you mean, and I'll admit it is a little vindicating hearing someone say this after consistently feeling frustrated with the overwhelm of novel writing--like, I always have a vivid collection of scenes for a given project living in my head when I start, but oops you have to do a bunch of setup and descriptions of people walking instead of the thing you actually want to write. I think what I have to say next might be a bit of a copout, but I think I just don't have very much interest in learning the mechanics of alternative form, nor do I completely feel like short fiction would be well suited to my tendency towards longer, ambitious plotlines. So, I don't know, I'll figure it out. I hope I don't end up like your friends, much as there's a very real threat of it right now.