i have not grieved the death of a website in a very, very long time.
this one is going to hurt as much as the death of my grandmother. this website and its community is so important to me and my mental health, and losing that means if i want online community i need to perform self-harm everyday and use sites i hate to use just because they're the only sites i can use.
capitalism kills everything we love. it kills everything, period. i wish this was the exception but instead the rule enforced itself.
at least i got to experience how beautiful the world could be while it lasted. time to go back to being a nihilistic, unhinged doomer i guess.
i'm sorry i never shared the posts i saw that were thoughtfully engaging and helped me learn more about the world around me. i was too deep in self-reflection to notice i hadn't shared them.
i'm sorry i very rarely left a comment on posts i really liked. i know artists kept saying they even love the superfluous comments more than likes or shares, but it didn't keep me from feeling like my comments would be exceptionally superfluous and unnecessary.
i'm sorry i didn't just post my asscheeks on this page instead of making an alternate NSFW account for it. i felt i was on track to deleting that page and using this one as The Big Account I Do Stuff From rather than splintering my shit into pieces, but i needed more time.
i'm sorry i didn't post my random thoughts more often. like, just shitchost some random bullshit i thought of. not that it would have contributed much but idk, maybe i would've gotten better at the whole shitchosting thing.
i wish i could have done things differently on this site but there were some mechanisms of Modern Internet that persisted for longer than i wanted them too. cohost was Old Internet in a way i don't think i'll ever see again. i should have used the time i had with it to relive the Old Internet days.
just know: if you made a post that was really cool, i probably saw it and deeply loved it. or maybe it wasn't cool, maybe it was about some weird niche thing only you know about. i probably still saw it and loved it because it kept Cohost weird in a way the rest of the internet can't be.
this place felt human. it felt warm and cozy, and not just because of the maroon colours on the site. it felt real. and im glad i got to be human with the rest of yall.
