seeing packaging describing “naturally aged cheddar.” what is unnaturally aged cheddar. cheddar from the beach that makes you old
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in reply to @jkap's post:
Alcohol-infused cheddar containing more alcohol than cheddar
I like things like "aged at least 13 months" like are you not sure how long? Maybe they found a bunch of old cheese in a warehouse and all they could tell from the poor records was it had to have been there at least 13 months and bingo new label claim!
cheddar that just woke up from cryosleep and is technically 10 years old and over 600 years old at the same time
cheddar that has been given tea stains and slightly burned at the edges to give a more rustic, aged look
A better question is what's unnaturally aged cheddar? (I can't read.)
Time-traveling cheddar?
Cheddar with post-traumatic stress?
Cheddar that works in retail?
Thanks for catching that. I guess I am more tired than usual today. Blah!
cheddar that I cast dark magic on so it ages 7 hour for every second it exists
actual answer: if i recall correctly, cheddar that isn't naturally aged just has stuff added to it that would be produced in it as part of the aging process, resulting in a similar taste to aged cheddar without having to let it age
Cheddar that they put in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber.
Can't be cheddar that was accelerated to relativistic speeds, that would make it younger.
Cheddar that has been around longer than a kind god would have intended. Cheddar with a lifespan extended via artificial means, which is slowly starting to become something else. Something Wrong. Something Unnatural. Cheddar which has no mouth, yet it must scream.
