🐺 okay, this one isn't as serious as I might make it sound. I just need to vent this somewhere, and I've already yelled enough at the rest of the Critters. hard to stay mad when they're all hugging you, you know?
so, we've been, once again, not doing well on the whole art front recently. mostly because the free time we've had has been allocated to stuff the others want to do. which is completely fair! but I just tried to do a bit of a challenge. drop random fursonas of ours, take 5 minutes, just try to draw them as best as possible. no erasing, darker lead pencil, no hiding flaws and all that. first one (splash's sona) went about as well as a 5-min challenge after a few weeks of limited practice could go. the second one was my sona, and... somehow it went alright? I realized about halfway through that it's not quite what I want from a more developed product, but for five minutes it's recognizably close enough! I'm happy!
then I tried Silk's sona. didn't even get halfway before I could feel the proportions being all wrong, and I just shut down.
I know this is probably the least productive way possible of trying to get back into the groove of art, doing rapid full body sketches of creatures with varied and distinct body shapes without using references while being a little out of it. I know I have every right to say to both that cursed perfectionism and the rest of us that "no, I am allowed to ask to spend time on learning again". and yet, the classic habit of coming to a full stop the moment things get a little hard and I don't immediately pick up something rears its head again. if I want to learn more than just my own errors onto themselves, I need to take some time to learn again. it just sucks that this hits immediately up against me not being good at asking for time to do so, and then when I do push through to do some art it's usually because I've promised a work to another one of us, which means no time to practice we just gotta get this done right now.
it's annoying to know you have a solution literally five centimeters from your nose and still it feels irrevocably far. just a little change of mindset and habits away. like I said, this one's less a full yelling session and more trying to frame my thoughts without just yelling at everyone else in there (they say hi btw!). shoutout to the skill you/we need, time management, being the one we're most sorely in lack of.