personal account. no fun allowed

 

professional: @videodante

star wars fanblog: @ct-0451

 

last.fm listening


personal website
dante.cool/

hthrflwrs
@hthrflwrs
LAWFULNEUTRALCHAOTIC
GOOD"Let's debunk some dangerous cooking myths created by FiveMinuteCrafts!""I just want to get people in the kitchen by making it more accessible""Hey you know that really fancy recipe that takes five hours? I figured out how to make a version that's 90% as good and takes twenty minutes"
NEUTRAL"Here's the CORRECT way to make [x dish] and any other method is wrong"just shows the recipe"Making GRAPE SODA out of RUBBER GLOVES!???"
EVILextremely extravagant recipe presented by someone who keeps insisting that this is the bare minimum "cheap" versionTikTok "recipe video" with no ingredient measurements or cook times, narrated by that one AI voiceFiveMinuteCrafts

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in reply to @hthrflwrs's post:

I'm tempted to make my own version that cites actual moments from Cooking YouTube videos...except I don't watch nearly enough Cooking YouTube to fill the whole grid. Here's what I've got:

Chaotic Neutral: Sous Vide Everything cooks a brisket for an entire month for the hell of it.
True Neutral: That one guy who wants to cook corn dogs for the Founding Fathers.
Lawful Evil: Binging with Babish insisting you grow your own herbs if you want an authentic version of that one Luca dish.

I want to throw in that Internet Shaquille can definitely veer into chaotic territory. Like when he just did the blue apron recipes, but with easier to source ingredients. And just general chaos. Like when he told everyone how to raise worms.

From left to right, top to bottom: how to cook that, basics with Babish, Adam Ragusea, You Suck at Cooking, Chef John (with Food wishes dot com), NileBlue (and occasionally Binging with Babish), Literally anything from Epicurious (the "3 levels of home cook" series in particular), Chef Club, and...uh...5minutecrafts. Metdaan fits into chaotic evil too, I guess.

Not sure if I'd consider NileRed a true cooking youtuber, the man used all of his chemistry knowledge to make margarine but still forgot to put salt in it!

Also honorable mention: Kiwami Japan (that guy who makes knives out of everything)

i loved adam ragusea making a whole video about the ridiculous process of making demi glace and then his next video is "if you just put an unflavored jello packet in concentrated stock it's the exact same thing."

Would Lawful Evil described that dickhead whos entire channel is "why would you eat a DISGUSTING BIG MAC when you can spend $50 and take two hours to make a homemade cheeseburger from scratch?"

the fiveminutecrafts are obviously lying, but the ones that really get me are the genre of "really expensive kitchen with a massive granite slab and then a skinny white lady commits a warcrime by mixing a lethal amount of cheese and eggs in a casserole dish and smile fakely about how good it tastes"