• she/her

Principal investigator at an undeserving midwestern university. I am ill-tempered and well-endowed. Beware.


I have a Cohost for art and writing!
cohost.org/lab-reports
profile pic by Xīn Jīn Mèng!
cohost.org/xinjinmeng

sociohat
@sociohat

sorry for bringing in both twitter AND reddit here but I wanna talk about it.

A lot of Soulful White Boys, and really any person who hasn't really "lived" a religion (or is dissatisfied by the one they were born with), seek Enlightenment in a way that I think is actually quite hedonistic: they want to experience Enlightenment, and they want it to to be so euphoric and cathartic that it utterly changes them.

Obviously that isn't really how it works. That kind of intense emotion is something that only a cult would promise you. Religion is mundane, and enlightenment won't hit you like a truck.


atomicthumbs
@atomicthumbs

soulful white boys love to sit at home on mushrooms from a chocolate bar and solipse about finding personal enlightenment and reaching nirvana. you fool. there is no such thing as finding enlightenment. there is only THE WORLD and THE SELF. You must humble yourself before the world to see your place in it: that of a small, vulnerable animal struggling to exist. Take a huge dose of something nobody has ever heard of and climb up to the top of the hill in a rainstorm. See the forest when every leaf and limb are dancing in the gale. Nothing is still or quiet here and everything wise has taken shelter already. Dodge falling branches. Get sopping fucking wet. Get cold. Mentally prostrate yourself before the storm. The human mind can only bring you misery—GET RID OF IT. Find your instincts and gaze up into the clouds, soaking your face in the rain. Scream. Demand it do its best to kill you. If your hair stands on end, lie on the ground. Find a hollow tree to sit in if you feel tired or miserable. You think you are a Great Mind but you have forgotten you are only a living creature. See THE WORLD and THE SELF for what they truly are. You are one of many independent biological agents, no different from a mouse or an ant or a coyote, finding yourself alive in an unimaginably vast and harsh place. Go out in the storm and learn it again.


doctorwednesday
@doctorwednesday

How to describe my experience with acid? It subtracts the anxiety and worry and I become very... cold isn't really the word. Sanguine. Removed. Clinical? I'm going to die someday, and that's fine, that's not my concern. Everything is as it should be. I also have more of a sense of my agency. There are so many things I could be doing once I don't worry about the consequences, once life and death are simply phenomena I observe as an ephemeral being. I mean I don't turn into a maniac; intellectually I know I ought to be concerned about preserving my life, and that it is not, on the whole, a good idea to take others'. But all the cruft, all the worry and doubt, is just gone, and audacity isn't really even audacity, it's just an option with probabilities of success or failure. I feel like I'm finally rising to the surface. Everything's razor-sharp. Total control. It would be wonderful if I could be like this all the time, the command I could take of my life, the decisions I could make without reservation, but I know you can't be on drugs continuously, I know that once the trip is over I'm going to revert to my normal mindset, and I'm a little sad about that, but that's fine, too. For now I'm this person. While she's here she's going to get things done.

I also turn into a real bitch! I am so snarky on acid. <3



shiny-ralts
@shiny-ralts

you know how we all told the reddit and twitter refugees that tumblr doesn't have an algorithm and you have to curate your experience by following tags and reblogging stuff and finding people to follow?
i am grabbing you by the sides of your head for emphasis here: that's real here.
it was mostly real on tumblr but here it is VERY real. there is not even a for you tab here. you HAVE to curate your own experience. i know it sucks having to rebuild all of that but there aren't porn bots here


doctorwednesday
@doctorwednesday

It kinda blows my mind that people have apparently been trained out of, I don't know, making friends and social connections on their own