The Clever Girl: A Riddle Tale

Once upon a time there was a porets, a nobleman who had three leaseholders on his domain. One leased his woods and another his mill, while the poorest of the three held the lease on the inn.

One day the nobleman sent for the three leaseholders and said, “I’m going to ask you three questions: What is the fastest thing in the world? What is the fattest thing in the world? And what is the dearest thing in the world? Whoever gives me the right answers within three days will be granted his leasehold for ten years without fee. But whoever gives the wrong answers will be driven from my estate.”

The first two leaseholders—the one who had the forest and the one who had the mill—didn’t take long to think the questions through. Both concluded that the fastest thing in the world was the nobleman’s horse; the fattest thing in the world was his pig; and the dearest thing in the world would undoubtedly be the woman he marries. And they were satisfied with their answers. But the poor innkeeper returned home in great perplexity because he had no idea what to say.

Now, the innkeeper had a beautiful and talented daughter who asked, “What makes you look so worried, Father?” He told her about the nobleman’s questions and said, “How can I help looking worried? I have no idea what the answers are.” “There’s nothing to worry about,” she said. “They’re simple enough: Thought is the fastest thing in the world; the earth is the fattest; and sleep is the dearest thing of all.”

At the end of the third day, all three leaseholders appeared before the nobleman. He immediately dismissed the first two from his estate because their answers were wrong. Turning to the innkeeper, he said, “I like your answers very much, but I know they didn’t come out of your own head. Tell me the truth: who told you what to say?”

The innkeeper confessed that his daughter had given him the answers.

The nobleman said, “If you have a daughter that clever, I want to see her. Let her come to me three days from now. But I want her to come neither walking nor riding, neither dressed nor naked. And I want her to bring a gift that is not a gift.”

The innkeeper returned home more downcast than before. His daughter said, “Now what’s wrong, Father? What makes you look so worried?” So he told her what conditions the nobleman had imposed. “Never mind,” said she. “There’s nothing to worry about. Now, here’s what I want you to do. I want you to buy a fisherman’s net, a goat, a pair of doves, and a couple of pounds of meat.”

And he bought all the things she asked for.

Then she stripped and wrapped herself in the net, so that she was neither dressed nor naked; she mounted the goat and of course her feet dragged, so that as she went along, she was neither riding nor walking. She carried the doves in one hand and the meat in the other, and in that fashion she made her way into the nobleman’s courtyard.

When the nobleman, who was watching from his window, saw her enter, he unleashed his dogs. But she threw them the meat and walked calmly past them into the house, where she said to the nobleman, “I’ve brought you a gift that is not a gift.” And she released the doves, who immediately flew out of the open window.

“I want to marry you because you’re so clever,” said the nobleman.

“But we can be married only on one condition: that you won’t meddle in the decisions I make when lawsuits are brought before me.” She promised not to meddle, and so they were married.

Some while later as she was standing beside an open window, she saw a weeping peasant pass by. “Why are you crying?” she asked. He said, “Listen. One of my neighbors and I own a stable in partnership. I own a mare, and my neighbor owns a wagon. Now, the mare gave birth to her foal under the wagon, and my neighbor claimed that the foal was his. So we asked the nobleman to decide between us, and the nobleman said the foal belongs to my neighbor. That’s why I’m weeping.”

She said, “Let me tell you what to do. Get yourself a fishing rod and line and stand in the sandy place just below the nobleman’s window. Pretend that you’re catching fish in the sand. When the nobleman asks, ‘How can you possibly catch fish in the sand?’ you must say, ‘If a wagon can give birth to a foal, then I can catch fish in the sand.’ ”

The peasant did as she said, and when the nobleman heard his reply, he understood at once that his wife was involved. Turning to her, he said, “Since you haven’t kept your part of our agreement, I want you to take the finest and dearest thing that you can find in the house and go back to your father.”

“All right,” she said. “But before I go, I want us to have one last meal together.” Well, he agreed to that. There was plenty of wine at the table, and she saw to it that he got good and drunk. When he passed out, she ordered the servants to put him into a carriage. Then she stepped into it herself, and they were driven off together to her father’s house.

The nobleman woke up sober and saw where he was. “How did I get here?” he asked.

She said, “You told me to take the finest and dearest thing I could find in your house. I could find nothing finer or dearer to me than you.”

“In that case,” said he, fondly, “let’s make up and go back home.”

And from that time on, they grew old together in wealth and honor.

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Glossary

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Annotations

TELLER: Khaye Tverski, 50 years old, of a rabbinic family, Shipkov (Szybkow), Poland.
COLLECTOR: Y.-L. Cahan, 1930.
SOURCE: Cahan (1931), no. 17, pp. 85–88; Cahan (1940), no. 28, pp. 119–22.
TALE TYPE: 875.
COMMENTS: This tale, along with “Hang the Moon on My Palace Roof,” “The Bishop and Moshke,” and “Why the Head Turns Gray before the Beard” (nos. 27, 75, and 101) are all about clever riddle-solvers—a very popular motif among East European Jews.